We'll Be Alright

Chapter 38

Fynn

A shriek wakes me up from my sleep.

I sit up abruptly.

No Eliana.

Where's Eliana?

"Fynn!", she cries.

Loud.

From afar.

What?

I rush downstairs.

She's standing legs spread in the kitchen.

Tears are streaming down her cheeks.

I look down and my face goes pale.

She cries so loudly.

I've never heard such thing.

My breathing hitches.

But I'm frozen.

I can't move.

What.

Why.

Why us?

She stumbles backwards against the counter.

She holds her belly and cries.

"Lord!", she screams, "Lord help me! Us! Them!"

She holds herself against the counter.

Crying in pain.

I fall to my knees in front of the puddle of blood.

"No no no no", I shake my head.

She cries as she slowly lefts herself to her knees, "my baby!"

She almost touches the blood when I stop her.

"Let me go!", she tries to free her wrists from my grip, "it's my baby!"

Tears stream down my cheeks.

My chest hurts from seeing her like this.

"My baby!", she screams.

I pull her onto my lap.

"Let me go!", she punches my bare chest with fists, "my baby!"

"It's going to be alright", I whisper shakily.

"My baby!", she screams.

I teeter her in my arms.

Tears are streaming down my cheeks.

She cries so loudly.

I didn't even know she was capable of such voice.

She's falling apart.

"It's going to be alright", I whisper shakily.

This can't be happening.

No no no.

She screams.

Crying violently.

It's awful.

Horrible.

Why her?

I press her head against the side of my neck.

Our baby.

No no no no.

Father help us.

Help the baby.

Somehow.

Save it.

"I killed my baby!", she cries, "I killed it!"

I stroke her hair with a sweaty hand, "you didn't, it's not your fault. It's going to be alright."

"He should've killed me instead of her!", she screams, "God, why didn't You kill me!"

"Don't you dare say that", I pant from anxiety, patting her back.

"My baby is dead, my baby! Why not me! Why didn't I—"

"Finish that sentence", I cup her neck and pull her face up from my neck, "I dare you."

"Fynn", she sobs, "our baby."

"I know", I nod, crying.

"I'm so sorry", she wiggles away from my arms, "I'm so so sorry."

She kneels in front of me.

What the?

The only one she's ever going to kneel in front of is God.

She's not at fault here.

She never was.

And never will be.

I try to pull her up again, "baby."

"No", she shakes her head, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

I cup her cheeks, "it's not your fault, you hear me? It's God's decision, God's plan to take His gift from us. He gave it and He can take it."

"But why", she cries, "Why, why, why!"

"I don't know", I shake my head, "I don't know, baby. Jesus says "You do not understand what I am doing now, but later you will". It's gonna be alright."

"Our baby, Fynn", her swollen lips wobble.

"It's okay", I whisper with a shaky voice, "God knows best, give it to Him. It's going to be alright"

Her face is red from crying.

Eyes a neon shade of green.

"I'm so sorry God", she whispers, sobbing, "take my pain in Jesus name, fill me with Your spirit, please Father."

She breathes deeply, "amen."

She rests her head against my shoulder.

I scoop her up into my arms and bring her to the bathtub.

My legs are stained with blood.

My child.

Lord, help me.

We both bathed and changed clothes.

I put Eliana into the bed and she fell asleep almost instantly.

I go downstairs again to wipe over the kitchen floor.

I exhale shakily, "I know You have a better plan for us, my Lord. I trust You with my life. But please, I beg you, do not hurt my woman like this ever again", a tear rolls down my cheek, "I can't bear it to see her in such pain. Hear my prayer, oh God."

I support my hands around the sink, "please, Father. In Jesus name, amen."

"Baby?", a voice says quietly.

I turn around, facing her.

"I'll go to bed", I sniff, "tomorrow's work."

I walk away from her when she stops my hand.

The touch of her fingers on mine ease my heart.

"You're not going to work tomorrow."

"I have to. I have meetings tomorrow."

"I don't care", she says simply.

I stare at her.

"I care about you and you'll rest tomorrow."

"Elia—"

"End of discussion", she says, "now go to bed."

"Only when you come with me."

She walks closer to me and rests her head against my chest.

I kiss her head, "we'll be alright."