If Only You Loved Me | ✓

Chapter 39

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Chapter 39

I think it was easier for others to see us in a bad light than to remember all the good things that we did. It was easier for Kelsey to throw away the years of friendship because of my background. I know. . .tama naman talaga siya.

"You don't know the whole story," sabi ni Lotte kay Kelsey.

Kelsey laughed, mockingly. "Do I have to? The mere fact that she. . .hid it from us already says a lot. Alam n'ya kasi na mandidiri tayo. I wouldn't even be friends with her in the first place if I knew!"

The judgment was so loud that it burned inside my ears. It went in and never went out anymore. Mas masakit dahil sa ka-close ko pa ito narinig. Umangat ang tingin ko sa kan'ya.

I heaved a breath as Kelsey glanced at me coldly. The friendship that we've built was slowly crumbling in front of me. Wala akong kawala rito.

I wasn't a saint. . .yet I didn't choose this background as well.

She rubbed it in my face, really well, if I may add.

"Yes. . .tama ka naman." Napalunok ako bago muling nagsalita. "I'm an illegitimate child.  I didn't know about my father. I grew up making stories about him. I thought of him as a playboy, as a bastard, and as someone who was probably already dead."

"Really? Based sa kwento ng tita ko, nangggulo raw ang mama mo," she snickered as she crossed her arms across her chest. "Hindi na rin ako magtataka kung malandi ang mama mo, I mean the apple couldn't fall differently from the trees, right?"

"Girl." Pumalatak si Lotte. "Bitch ka ba talaga? Kung alam lang namin ni Ziah na gan'yan, matagal ka na naming nilayuan! How dare you spew nonsense to Ziah right now?!"

"Is it really nonsense or it's the hard truth you couldn't swallow?" Kelsey hissed at us.

Mabuti na lamang na nasa isang coffee shop kami. Kung hindi siguro kami nandito ngayon ay kanina pa kinalbo ni Lotte si Kelsey. I just know based on how Lotte's veins are protruding already. Mukhang kanina pa siya nagtitimpi rito.

I was still numb and dumbfounded. Pakiramdam ko kung ano mang sabihin ko ngayon ay hindi makakarating kay Kelsey. She already built a version of me inside her head, which I couldn't tear it apart now. Matayog na ang nabuo n'yang haka-haka tungkol sa akin.

My goal right now is to know. . .who made her think that way? Imposibleng dahil lang sa nalaman n'ya kaya n'ya sasaktan ang mga mahalagang tao sa akin. I doubt it could fuel her to get her hands dirty. So it must be someone who loathed me and my mother.

"Then tell me, anong alam mo?" I probed her, testing her patience. "Sino ka ba sa buhay ko? A friend of mine who couldn't make a guy settle down on her? Isn't that who you are?"

"How dare you?!" She screeched and almost launched on me. "Ikaw pa talaga ang nagsabi n'yan! Your mother was the one who disturbed a loving family! Hindi mo alam ang dinulot nitong sama ng loob sa asawa ng tatay mo!"

Asawa ng tatay mo. . .there was the confirmation that I needed. May taong galit nga sa amin. Lalo na sa nanay ko. . .or maybe she loathes me more because I was the living reminder that her husband was unfaithful.

Nangdilim ang paningin ko sa kan'ya. At that moment, I wanted to yell back at her for siding with a murderer. Pero ano bang alam n'ya? She could only pull her own truths. . .she doesn't want to hear our sides anymore.

"My mother never contacted him! For all the years that I've lived! Lahat ng gastos para sa akin ay nanay ko lang ang umako. I don't even want to regard him as my father! Tanging sperm donor lang ang tingin ko sa kan'ya," I snapped because of her accusations.