Volcano | Bangchan

Introspection & chaos

Two weeks passed by. Of course, I told my crew what happened with both of the boys. They weren't really surprised about both endings. And to be fair, even I realized a bit later that it was kind of obvious. After the emotions moved on to the reflection, I knew that it was for the best. I was going to focus on my friendship with everyone and put my love life on pause. 

I saw Hyunjin the day after, and we did our K-drama night as usual. It was nice to see that nothing really changed between us. Our friendship was undamaged. I spent my week as usual, back to my habits. The only thing that was out of habit was me avoiding Bangchan. Even though I knew it was unfair of me to be mad at him, I couldn't hold it. Being rejected like that hurt like hell, and I had no idea how to face him. Each time he entered the room where I was, I would immediately find an excuse to go elsewhere and go without paying attention to him. When I had to do his make-up, I would exchange with my teammate to do another member. The boys were worried about my behavior, afraid that this could become a habit. But they chose to give me time. After all, it takes time to recover from a heartbreak.

It was Thursday night. I came from the grocery store, hands full of snacks for a movie night with my favorite couple. Yeah, I was third-wheeling, but I was growing used to it. As I entered the living room, I found them cuddling together on the couch. I melted : "Aaaaaaw, can I come and cuddle too ?". Nomi answered without even sparing me a glare : "Just in case you were serious, no you can't.". I giggled : "Okay, lovebirds, pick a movie while I prepare the food.". Once I had disappeared in the kitchen, Changbin straightened up, which made Nomi complain : "I was comfyyyyy ! Why are you leaving me ?". Bin kissed his forehead. "Sorry babe, I need to talk to Sooki real quick.". Nomi nodded : "Kay. Good luck trying to knock some sense to her, I've already tried.". Of course, she already knew what he wanted to discuss. I was busy putting the snacks in bowls when Binnie entered the kitchen to sit on the chair in front of me. 

He silently watched me for a while, perfectly aware of how it was pressuring me. It only took a few minutes to get on my nerves : "Okay. What do you want, Bin ?". He calmly stated : "You already know what I want to talk about.". I turned around and opened the closet to bring the glasses, not commenting. "He is suffering from the situation, you know ? He can't stand you avoiding him.". I looked down, feeling a bit guilty. Changbin continued : "When he comes home, he goes straight to his bedroom and doesn't speak much with us. It's been a while since I saw him in that state.". 

It broke my heart knowing how sad he was. I didn't want to avenge myself. The point of ignoring him was to give me time to process, not to hurt him. I turned to face him. "Binnie... I know I am being unfair. But I can't help it, it just... hurts.". Changbin gave me a sympathetic smile : "I know, Soo... If I am being honest, you are not the only one hurt in the process...". He sighed and thought out loud : "This guy drives me crazy sometimes when he is not honest with himself.". I raised an eyebrow, a bit confused by his statement. What does he mean ? Bin realized what he had just said and quickly changed the subject : "Anyway, you two need to sort it out because we all miss your special bond. And just to make you more guilty, the man is a wreck.". He stood up to go back in the living room, but didn't fail to add : "Oh, and you look miserable too, by the way.". I threw him a chips bag that he easily caught. He went away, blessing me with his iconic laugh. God, I can't be mad at him when he laughs like that.

I sighed as I leaned against the counter, deep in my thoughts. Changbin was right. Even though it was hard for me, I had to get past my feelings. After all, we were gonna see each other almost every day. And the situation wasn't only affecting us, but the whole team. It had to stop, and I was the only one in charge. But tonight wasn't the time to take action. I took my plate and went to my friends, ready to spend a night watching Netflix without thinking about anything else.

Friday night came quickly. Nomi and I spent the day training students who wanted to be make-up artists. It was a side job we took with the support of JYP to train future recruits. I loved teaching my art. And it was rewarding because I learned a lot from them, too. Each artist had his own style, and most of them inspired me. They were so talented, I swear for a moment I thought they could steal my job. The new generation of idols is gonna be lucky to have them by their side. I jumped in Nomi's car as soon as the class was done. I sighed satisfied : "I love doing this, but this is exhausting !". Nomi agreed : "Yes, they are something else ! Too much energy for us.". "Seungmin is right, we are old.". "Indeed, but I will never let him know he's right.". We enjoyed the silence during the rest of the road. We weren't heading home tonight. The boys wanted to do a crepe party. They were absolutely in love with it since I introduced them to French cooking. I sent the recipe to Lee Know so they could start instead of waiting for us. But that was a BIG mistake.

As we passed the front door, we were welcomed by pure chaos and yelling. On one side, a wild Binnie covered in flour was strangling a laughing Jisung while I.N was on Binnie's back trying to stop him. On the other side, Lee Know was scolding the cooking duo, aka Lix and Seungmin. Lix was looking at the ground with the cutest pout while Seungmin was defying his Hyung with his cheeky face. Next to them was a plate with something that kinda looked like burned crepes. And in the middle of this REALLY loud chaos, Hyunjin was yelling out of nowhere, probably overwhelmed by everything. 

We stood there for a moment, contemplating the chaos while considering running away as we never came in the first place. But we had to help our poor Minho to manage this bunch of kids. We looked at each other knowingly, and we took action. "SEO CHANGBIN LET GO OF HAN IMMEDIATELY !". "YALL GO SIT ON THE COUCH.". Everyone froze and slowly turned to us. I watched each one of them with a death stare, but I was laughing internally. Nomi had already given all her patience to the students from earlier, she had nothing left for the guys. "RIGHT NOW!". Hyunjin dared to try arguing : "But -". "THAT IS NOT UP TO DISCUSSION HWANG HYUNJIN." Nomi cut him off, pointing at the couch. The boys didn't argue back, and everyone sat on the couch or in front of it.

They were all looking at us with pouty faces. It was hard not to laugh. I crossed my arms and asked : "Can someone explain why it looks like the kitchen exploded, why Changbin is covered in flour, and why Minho looks like he's either gonna kill y'all or cry himself to sleep ?". Dumb of me to ask all these questions, because of course, everyone started explaining, which created an incoherent brouhaha. I yelled : "ENOUGH.". Everyone fell silent. 

I sighed and restarted : "Okay. My bad. One thing at a time. Changbin, why are you covered in flour ?". Changbin pointed an accusatory finger towards his 3racha teammate, who was trying hard not to laugh. "This bitch called me from the kitchen telling me that something happened to my precious Felix ! I rushed to the kitchen to help and he was hiding behind the door with a plate full of flour. He threw it at my face !". Ji was on the verge of crying from holding his laugh. Nomi and I were trying our best to take our Dwaekki seriously, but his white face wasn't helping. I had to change the subject quickly before cracking. 

"Okay. And what about the kitchen ?". This time it was Felix who raised his hand, still looking at the floor like a kid. "It might be Seungmin's and I's fault.". Seungmin rolled his eyes and I swear Lee Know considered for a moment Stray Kids with 7 members. Felix explained : "Lee Know Hyung summoned us to help him prepare the crepe batter. But there weren't enough eggs, so he left for the grocery store. He told us not to start without him but he left the recipe on the counter. Seungmin told me we should recreate Daengnyang school. So... we did.". I pinched the bridge of my nose. "That explains the state of the kitchen, the burned food, and Lee Know's state...". "Well it wouldn't have burned if Lee Know Hyung didn't distract us by scolding us." Seungmin muttered. Minho took one step in my best friend's direction and both Nomi and I got between those two before they started a fight.

I tried to calm down everybody. "Okay so here is what we're gonna do : Changbin, go with Nomi wash yourself. Seungmin, Felix, and Han you'll clean the kitchen. Minho, you... go take a walk to calm yourself. I saw some stray cats in the streets near here, go feed them. Let's forget about the crepes for tonight, this is too touchy. I'm gonna order pizzas and I.N and Hyunjin will go get them. How about that ?". Everyone nodded, except Seungmin who was in a mood to argue about everything. "Why do I have to clea-". Felix covered his mouth with his hand. "It's okay Soo, we're gonna clean our mess, we promise !". He flashed me with his bright smile and I overdosed from his cuteness. I was about to clap to give the go-ahead, but I had one last question. "Before we start, Hyunjin, why were you screaming in the middle of the kitchen ?". Everyone looked at him, he shrugged and gave the most Dramaqueen answer : "Felt like it.".