Between Us

Chapter 49 : Chasing Ghosts

I reached out, my hand trembling as I touched the stranger's shoulder. "Engfa?" I whispered.

The person turned, confusion clear on her face as she frowned at me, her eyes darting to my hand still resting on her shoulder. I quickly pulled it back, feeling the heat rise to my face. "I— I'm sorry," I stammered, taking a step back. "I thought you were someone else."

She gave me a small, awkward smile. "It's alright," she said, her tone gentle before turning back and walking away down the aisle, leaving me standing there, feeling more lost than ever.

I watched her go, the weight of my mistake crashing down on me. Stupid. What was I even thinking? Of course, it wasn't Engfa. She's gone. I felt like such a fool, chasing ghosts, seeing her face in everyone, everywhere I went. I let out a frustrated sigh and dragged myself back to the car.

I collapsed into the seat and let my head fall against the steering wheel. The silence around me felt suffocating, too heavy, as if it was pressing down on my chest. I was losing it. I was really losing it. I squeezed my eyes shut, fighting the urge to scream. It was as if the world was moving on without me, and I was stuck, unable to catch up.

With a long, shaky breath, I started the car again, but I didn't drive home. Instead, I headed toward the only place that still felt like it had some meaning—our place. The lake.

The moment I parked, a wave of memories hit me. This was where Engfa had taken me that first time. We weren't even together yet, but I knew then, deep down, that I was already falling in love with her. I could still see her there, laughing, her hair blowing gently in the wind, her smile wide and carefree. I closed my eyes for a second, as if I could hold onto the memory forever.

I made my way down to the edge of the lake and sat down, pulling my knees close to my chest. The water rippled gently in front of me, just like it had that day. But now, it felt different—emptier.

Tears welled up again, and I let them fall, no longer caring about holding them back. My heart ached in a way I couldn't describe, and the weight of it all pressed down on me.

"How am I supposed to do this without you?" I murmured to the air, my voice soft and broken, as if I were speaking to her. "How am I supposed to survive when you're not here?"

I wiped my face with the back of my hand, my chest tightening again. I could almost hear her laugh in the distance, see her standing beside me, but when I blinked, it was gone. Just like her.

----

Heidi tugged at the blanket covering me, sighing in frustration when I didn't budge. "Come on, Charlotte," she pleaded, her voice softening as she pulled at the edges again. "Nudee's on her way, and she's bringing pizza. You know you love pizza." Her words hung in the air, hopeful, but I didn't respond. I just stayed there, curled up, the blanket pulled tight over my head, blocking out the world.

I could hear Heidi sigh again, this time deeper, more defeated. "Please, just come out of this bed," she murmured, almost like she was talking to herself now. The room was quiet except for the sounds of her shifting uncomfortably beside me. I knew they were trying, but it felt like nothing could reach me right now.

I heard Tina's footsteps approach, softer, more hesitant. "Char," she said gently, sitting on the edge of the bed. I could feel her weight sink into the mattress next to me. "We're worried about you." Her voice was calm, the kind of calm that tries not to show panic, but I could hear the worry behind it.

Tina's hand found its way to my back, a light touch that felt both comforting and overwhelming at the same time. "You don't have to say anything, okay? But maybe just come out and sit with us for a while. You don't have to pretend to be okay. Just... be with us. We miss you."