Power

We got you

TW: Nightmares, HYDRA flashbacks

"Please stop!!! IT HURTS!! STOP!!!!! Please don't... DON'T LEAVE ME!!!!!" I sobbed, my whole body shaking.

The pain shot through my body, my muscles tightened and I screamed again. I saw them through the window...they were going to save me...

Their faces morphed into a giant, blurry clown, laughing at me. The pain got even worse, I heard myself screaming, but my soul was floating somewhere in mid air.

"Poodle!" the clown screamed in a mocking tone, his sharp teeth flickering in the light.

The room started filling with water, faster and faster, and my head was getting heavy, I was drowning... my throat and lungs burned, my vision blurred, the pain was worse than ever.

I wasn't gonna make it, this was it... I was gonna die. Were they gonna miss me? Who's they?

The clown bent over me and whispered "Hail HYDRA".

"PLEASE!!!" I tried to beg for the pain to be over, but all I could hear was my muffled sound underwater.

I wanted the pain to be over... please...

I woke up in a dark room I didn't recognize. My heart was racing and I heard it beat inside my ears. My t-shirt was soaked and my hair was dripping. The room was spinning... 

I realized I was in the Tower. I tried to breathe deeply to calm myself down, but it didn't work. A wave of nausea hit me and I ran to the bathroom. 

I bent over the sink and threw up. My throat felt raw and hot. I collapsed on the cold floor and dug my hands into my hair, trying to calm down.

I rocked back and forth, sobbing. I tried to muffle the sound of my crying with my palm, but it got wet and slipped off my mouth. I turned on the shower, hoping I'd cover the sound and let myself sob.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to bang my head against the wall, anything, anything, so I could go to sleep. 

I cried my eyes out, curled up on the floor and rocked back and forth for hours.

I was falling...

****

I hear a loud bang on the bathroom door.

"Hannah! Hannah, are you in there??"

I snapped back to reality. My face was red and swollen from crying and my hands were hot.

I replied in a brittle and croaky voice.

"Uh...y-yeah".

Who was at the door? Was it Wanda?

"Are you alright?"

I sniffed and wiped my face.

"I'm fine..."

"It's me, Wanda, can I open the door?"

"Uhm... wait a second".

I splashed cold water on my face and quickly practiced a fake smile in the mirror.

I hesitantly opened the door.

"Hi, Wan".

Her hair was messy and she wore a bathrobe over her pajamas. She looked sleepy, but concerned.

"Are you ok? We heard the shower run for like, 2 hours and we thought we heard you cry".

"I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up".

"Nonsense, what's wrong?"

"Nothing" I shrugged.

"Hannah, please... Nat, Tony and Steve are outside your room, we met on the hallway. They all wanted to check on you. We care about you, honey, please talk to us".

I rubbed my forehead and sighed.

"I'll make some tea and we can talk" she said.

She rubbed my back and took my hand. I hesitantly followed her outside the room.

I saw Tony, Nat and Steve's concerned faces when they saw me.

"Are you ok?"

"What's wrong, Poodle?"

"Kiddo?"

I felt like I couldn't walk all the way to the kitchen, so I let go of Wanda's hand.

"It's uh... nothing, really, just a... nightmare".

"A nightmare? What was it about?" asked Steve in concern.

I wanted to break the chains that restrained me. I wanted to be free.

So I told them.

I told them all about my nightmare, and how this wasn't the only one. How I almost never sleep, how the world doesn't even make sense anymore because I'm so tired. How I can't even tell what's real or not.

By now, I was sobbing on the floor.

"I just want to sleep... I wanna sleep... I wanna sleep..." I rocked back and forth, caught in the deadly spiral of my thoughts.

"Hey, hey, look at me!" I hear Tony.

I looked up at him.

"I wanna sleep, Tony, please... Please help me, I can't take this anymore..."

Hot tears were streaming down my face.

"We got you, kiddo".

I felt Steve's hands wrapping around me and picking me up.

I covered my face with my hands.

He took me to the living room and set me on the couch. Wanda made some tea. Nat covered me over with a blanket and hummed a lullaby, running her fingers through my hair. Tony put on "Star Wars" and sat next to me. So did the others. I was squished between them, feeling safer than ever. I took a sip of the hot tea and tried to follow the movie, but I felt my eyelids closing.

The last thing I remember is Nat running her fingers through my hair, humming, and someone rubbing my shoulder. I was safe and warm.

"We got you" Tony whispered.