Draupadi

CHAPTER XXXIII

"When did a dragon ever die from the poison of a snake."

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I sighed as I brushed the queen's hair, getting ready to weave it into an intricate braid. My husbands had all taken on their roles in the palace. Yudhisthra had become Kanaka, a learned Brahmin and the king's advisor. Bheem was now Chef Vallabha, filling the kitchens with his delicious dishes. Arjun had transformed into Brihannala, the dance teacher for Princess Utaara. Nakul became Granthika, the keeper of horses, and Shadeva took on the role of Tantripal, the caretaker of cows.

I had assumed the role of the queen's hairdresser, a sairandhri, asking her to address me as such. I didn't give myself a name as it would make all this real. More real than it should be.

I rarely saw my husbands now, except for Arjun, since we often found ourselves in the women's quarters. But even there, a chasm stretched between us. We had to maintain distance. We definetly couldn't afford to show any connection between us. I braided the queen's hair. "Do you miss your Gandharva husbands?" the queen asked suddenly looking at me. "Huh," Oh yes. I had told her I had five Gandharva husbands that I had to stay away from due to a curse. "Oh, yes of course I do." I said pointing a look at Arjun.

Just then Uttara ran in talking at a very high speed. For a sixteen year old she certainly had extreme energy. Her brother walked in behind. "Whatever she said, I gaurantee it is not true." he declared and then threw a pointed look at his sister." "Darling, Uttar you both must get along." the queen said and Uttara smirked in his direction. I smiled underneath my veil. These kids were certainly cute.

Uttara was strikingly beautiful, with doe-like eyes that sparkled with mischief and a fair complexion that blushed easily. Her straight, silky black hair framed her petite figure, and her pink lips curved into a cheerful smile. Dressed in a delicate onion pink ensemble, adorned with fine jewelry, she looked almost doll-like. But her eyes no matter what always seemed so glassy, she had naturally sad eyes. Almost as if god had decided to put all the world's misery into her eyes.

The queen's voice cut through my thoughts like a sudden breeze. "Sairandhri, go give my brother that wine jug. As soon as you finish the braid, you must go," she commanded, and I felt a familiar weight settle in my chest. I had no choice but to comply.

Her brother, Keechaka, the commander-in-chief of Virat Desam, had been pursuing me with an intensity that made me uneasy. I couldn't help but frown at the thought of him. He had an air of arrogance about him, a man who certainly didn't understand how to treat a woman with respect.

It all started the day he had accidentally caught a glimpse of my face while I was tending to my duties. Since then, it was as if a switch had flipped within him. He had developed a fixation, often casting lingering glances in my direction, his gaze heavy with unspoken desires. I had noticed the way his eyes roamed over me, sizing me up as if I were an object rather than a person.

As I continued to braid the queen's hair, the thought of facing Keechaka sent a shiver down my spine. I couldn't shake the feeling that his intentions were anything but honorable. What was I going to do?

I marched down the richly carpeted corridor, the weight of the jug feeling oddly significant. As I approached Keechaka's open door, I set it down on the polished table. "The queen sent me with this," I said, glancing back to leave.But the door swung shut behind me, and Kichaka stepped closer, his eyes narrowing with determination. "Marry me. I'll give you everything you need-protection, pleasure, anything your heart desires."I raised an eyebrow, unfazed. "I am married. I have five Gandharva husbands."He smirked, a predatory glint in his gaze. "I want you. When I want something, I always get it. What use are those husbands of yours?"I straightened, the tension thickening. "You really don't want to challenge my husbands. Their loyalty is unbreakable, and their wrath is a force to be reckoned with."Kichaka stepped closer, his voice low. "And yet, here you are, alone with me.""Because I'm fulfilling a duty," I shot back, my heart steady. "You underestimate the strength of my husbands. They would move mountains for me, and you'd find yourself outmatched."His confidence wavered, if only for a moment. "Do you truly think they'd come for you?""I know they would. I will not betray them, and you would be wise to remember that." Kichaka's expression shifted, a mix of intrigue and frustration. "So, you'll choose them over me?""Every time," I said firmly. "You may see me standing here, but my heart belongs to them. Do not mistake my presence for weakness."

He stepped dangerously close, and in a surge of instinct, I bolted for the door. My heart raced as I dashed toward the court, desperate to escape. But he was right behind me, his grip tangling painfully in my hair.

I nearly sobbed as I stumbled, thoughts racing. I should have cut my hair the day Dushasana touched it. "Help!" I cried out, but my voice was lost in the chaos, no one daring to intervene, paralyzed by fear of Kichaka's wrath.

Yudhisthira and Bhima were nearby, their faces stricken with concern, but they remained frozen, caught in a web of uncertainty. I felt so alone, drowning in despair.

Finally, Kichaka released me, a cruel smirk lingering on his lips as he walked away. I crumpled to the ground, tears streaming down my face. How many times had I faced this? Dushasana had tried to disrobe me, Jarasandha had kidnapped me, and now Kichaka. Each encounter felt like another cruel test, another weight pressing down on my spirit.

"Why, God?" I whispered, choking on my sobs. "Why must I endure this suffering? How much more can I bear?" I had never once thought I was beautiful, never once accepted it and yet suffered because of it. What sin had I commited to be born as a woman?

That night I walked to Bheem's room, he seemed surprised to see me. I closed the doors and sat on his bed and leaned onto him. I felt safer feeling his strong muscular body against mine. "Kalyani," he whispered. I silently cried. "If Keechaka continues this torment I refuse to live a moment longer. By tommorow nightfall I will kill myself.' He held me closer "I'll kill him. What use of us without you. Don't you ever say something like that again. Invite him to the dancing hall. I'll kill him." I clung to him for few minutes and then left. By tommorow nightfall Keechaka would die.

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I very much liked this chapter. I really like Uttara.I beleive I captured the pain of being a woman. Hope you liked it too. Please read,vote and comment.