Consider Me

Chapter Forty Three: Lily

A week after my first date with Lucas, I got a call from Prof. Douglas. She wanted me to meet her Monday morning sharp at eight. I thought I'll ask Sabina to come with me but something in my gut told me to go alone. 

So I did. 

Right before the first class, I excused myself from the group and went to Douglas's office. The corridor leading to the teacher's quarter was almost empty. A few students lingered with assignments and test papers. Mostly the teacher's pet, the rest were in the canteen downstairs. 

When I reached her office, I tentatively knocked on her door and waited. 

"Come in," she says a second later. 

I open the door slowly and enter. I don't know what I was expecting but my nerves were in jumble the entire time I headed this way. "Good morning professor," I say, making my way to the middle of the room. 

She looked up from the computer and smiled. "Morning love. How was your weekend?"

"Good," Magical. I nodded remembering my date with Lucas. 

"Take a seat. I have something to tell you," Well there goes the magic. 

I sat across from her, my shoulders aligned with tension. "You found something, didn't you?" I went straight to the elephant in the room. We both knew why she called me here. 

Prof. Douglas's lips thinned, "I did,"

"Was I...right?" I looked at with impatience, hope and a little bit of dread. 

I had to be right. Lucas told me she broke her leg. I didn't tell the professor this news because I didn't wanted the label that I sabotaged Gloria. Another accusation will make me do something stupid and I wasn't going to let Gloria of all people to ruin my last chance at the grant.  

I wanted the professor to come to the conclusion herself that Gloria cheated. She wasn't the one who performed in the finals. She wasn't the one who won. Someone else did in her name. And I want to know who. 

The professor remained quiet for a long time, pondering whether to involve a student in internal politics of the school or not. But when she saw my undetermined gaze, she said, "Your doubts were right, Lily,"

Every breath woosh out of me at that statement. I feel like some was caressing my face after slapping me. On one hand, I was glad the Professor now knows I am not a saboteur but the other part, the dancer in me? The girl who spend sleepless nights on perfecting her moves and lost, was hurt.

I thought I lacked. I thought I had to practice more. 

Never for a second, I imagined the problem didn't lie with me. It was someone else's selfish desire. 

I stare at the hardwood table for a long time, trying to push the tightness in my throat. I don't want to appear weak. But I really need a second or two to gather my thoughts. I am grateful that professor gave me the needed time and when I was ready to talk, she met my sad eyes with one of her own. "I am sorry Lily. We should've been more careful with the auditions,"

I nodded awkwardly. "So what now?"

"Now I want you to focus on the competition. It's only a few days away. I don't want you to think about this and lose focus. What happened last year was unfair and I will deal with it accordingly. Gloria will be disciplined. Leave that to me. You just keep practicing your dance for now,"

I wanted to ask her if Gloria would actually be punished or not. It's not unknown her family is influential but I remained tight lipped, too many thoughts whirling inside me. With a small nod, I pushed my chair back and stood up.