Consider Me

Chapter Forty Eight: Lucas

"So she left," I conclude, after hearing the entire story from Lily.

We're in the kitchen, sitting on the floor. The refrigerator door is open to provide light and slight coldness in the room. There is a box of pizza between us. Two pieces remaining. Our dinner for the night. 

Lily hums swallowing the bite and drinking the soda. "She assumed his family won't accept her. Left without informing anyone. Not even her parents. A year or two after my birth she contacted them and told them where she was. They moved of course and had been staying her until now,"

"You're grandparents had no idea who your father was then?" 

"No. She refused to tell them or...me ever,"

"Wow," 

Lily smiles tightly. She is wearing one of my old T-shirt. It's slightly big on her but covers her. "Everything from her point was an assumption. She projected her hate for-" she looks at me, wordlessly making her point. "You know and I believed her. There wasn't much I could do. Children believe what their parents say and I didn't have a father so she was mostly my only source of any basic world knowledge,"

"It's not your fault, Lily," I tell her as I take her hand and rub them, "We all have a little stereotypical mentality and I am not blaming you,"

"It's not about the blame, Lucas," 

We're silent for a minute. Just eating the last slices of pizza in the wake of dawn. "Are you going to talk to her?"

"Not until I have all the words I want to say to her,"

"And your father?"

Lily sighs, "I know I should be spending time with him. Lord knows he lost eighteen years of my life but just not yet," She looks at me vulnerably, "Do you think that makes me selfish?"

"No. A human being," I pull her to me and she visibly shivers when she puts her head on my shoulder, 

"I don't want to make him wait. I always wondered where my father is. Who he was or if he really didn't want me like mum said,"

"You don't like the answers now," 

She exhales. "I feel blue,"

I rub her arm gently and pat her until she relaxes. By the time we finish our pizza, it's closer to sunrise. I thought we could take a shut eye for an hour or two before we get ready for school but Lily couldn't sleep after drinking coffee. I thought we could skip school today. It won't be a big deal but Lily wanted a distraction.

I drove us both to Hawthorne High the next morning where our classes went longer than it should. With the upcoming seniors week program, the teachers were more busy monitoring the event than appearing focused for our lessons. It was the middle of the session so exams and all were aligning right after the competition. We still had a month to go but academic revisions needed to start if we wanted a fair chance for getting selected to the Yale placements. 

I had a busy morning. One that didn't include attending classes. I was on a mission and I needed Anthony's help. I figured he'll be in the library but upon a quick search I found he skipped school today. Reasons unknown. 

I didn't want to do the same mistake again by asking Cal for help but my options were limited. I went to his office the following hour after my meetup with the coach. 

He was in his office wearing his typical scowl and a frown near his lips. God I forgot what he looks like smiling. He looks up from the computer when I opened the door. "I don't have time for you today. Mum and Dad are flying for the after-school Gala,"