A Better World With You

Chapter 24

As he welcomed me at his apartment, he then led me to sit on his sofa and stayed beside me. I cried a lot more today and I think at this time, I should be resting my eyes so I took out my glasses first and wiped my tears away while following Justine's instruction to breath with him slowly.

Seconds for inhale and seconds for exhale, we did that for more like five times and finally, I calmed down and my body started to relax. "I'm not going to ask if you're okay because judging from your situation you're not good so I'm just gonna ask if you're now feeling better?" Justine said and I nodded only without uttering a word. After that, both of us remained silent and was thinking of what should we say next.

"I'm sorry for disturbing you late at night." I uttered while looking at his hands on his lap.

"You're not a disturbance and will never be considered one. In fact, you're in a good timing. I was just having bad dream and thank God, you woke me up." He solemnly said while also looking at his hands that are now doing random things. I smiled when I heard that. It's making me feel like a relevant person to his life.

"I also did mention that I want to be by your side always, so whatever things might go wrong on your side, you can run to me and I'm willing to embrace you." He added and this time our eyes met. I see sincerity in his expression and I hear the compassion on his voice. It's very assuring and is giving a sense of security on my part. I never knew that on this day, I will get to see Justine being like this.

He had been a walking red flag in my eyes for about two years already but now, the said color is slowly fading. Though, I shouldn't be sure about it because I don't completely know him.

Now, Airene's words had taken over my mind. Totoo nga bang nabubulag lang ako sa kabaitan ni Justine? minamanipulate niya lang ba ako? Or nag-ooverthink lang talaga ako? Hindi ko kasi alam, naguguluhan ako pero kitang kita naman sa mga galaw niya na mapagkakatiwalaan mo at willing kang tulungan. He doesn't treat me like one of the girls who he used to play with, I think he just want to live a normal life with me and stay as best buddies.

I blinked my eyes with haste as I was taken back from the things occupying my mind. Inayos ni Justine ang kanyang upo sa paraan na makakaharap ako nito. Sinandal nito ang kanyang siko sa may sandalan ng sofa at humalumbaba ito habang nananatiling nakatingin pa rin ito sa aking mga mata.

"George, is it okay if you tell me what happened?" He asked and I nodded. I have began to tell him everything that happened starting from the misunderstanding between me and Airene, the agonizing feeling inside the school gym, and the problem within our family. To be honest, my storytelling has become very detailed due to the emotions rushing in like a rollercoaster and at the end, he listened just as he promised and he understood just as he committed.

"It's so frustrating, Justine! Ang dami mo nang ginagawa, ang dami mo nang responsibilidad na inaako, and dami mo nang iniisip, tapos dadagdag pa 'yung ganoong bagay na hihila sa'yo pababa. Ayaw ko magpatalo sa mga ganitong hamon pero minsan naman kasi sumosobra na e, hindi ko rin alam kung bakit kailangan kong humantong sa ganito. Nakakapagod! Nahihirapan ako! Ang mas nakakalungkot pa rin kasi, sarili mong pamilya hindi ka na rin mapasaya, hindi ka na rin makapagpahinga kasi ang daming magugulong problema na gusto mong intindihin pero hindi mo magawa."

"'Yung kahit pag-uwi ko lang galing sa school, gusto kong maramdaman 'yung pahinga, gusto kong maramdaman 'yung ginhawa, gusto kong masabi na 'Sa wakas! Makakauwi na' hindi 'yung kakabahan sa kung anong pwedeng mangyari kapag umuwi ka. Sa totoo lang kakayanin ko pa 'yung mga problema sa school, pero sa bahay? Parang nakakasakit naman yata sa damdamin." Along these lines, he didn't even bother to make any comments which is good. He just listened and take everything to heart. With that, I was able to release all of my anger and loneliness.