Dear. My Darling | Gongfourz / Taehan

Chapter 45

Taesan’s world felt like it had collapsed. He stood in his apartment, the silence around him suffocating, the weight of what had just happened pressing down on him. Leehan’s words, the hurt in his eyes—they echoed in his mind, relentless.

“I can’t hear it.”

“Don’t explain.”

But Taesan couldn’t stop the thoughts that consumed him. The moments from that night, from the days leading up to this, kept replaying in his mind like a cruel, endless loop.

How could I have let it get this far? Taesan thought, pacing back and forth in the dimly lit room. His mind raced, a tangled mess of guilt and regret.

He had known this moment would come—he had known that one day, Leehan would find out. But he hadn’t been ready. No matter how much he tried to prepare himself, nothing could have prepared him for the look in Leehan’s eyes when he said he was getting married.

It was too much.

I never wanted this. I never wanted to hurt him.

Taesan’s hands shook, and he sank down onto the couch, burying his face in his hands. The weight of everything was suffocating. The truth was out. Leehan knew now, and there was no going back.

He’ll hate me.

The guilt gnawed at his insides. How could he explain to Leehan that he wasn’t marrying someone he loved, that he wasn’t making this choice out of his own will?

His father had forced his hand, threatened his family’s livelihood if he didn’t comply. The truth was far more complicated than what Leehan had seen, but how could he say that?

How could he explain the years of manipulation, the promises made in silence, and the expectations that had bound him like chains?

Taesan stared at his phone on the table, still untouched, still filled with unread messages from Leehan. Why hadn’t I answered?

He should’ve called him back. He should’ve explained. But every time he thought about doing it, his chest tightened, a deep sense of helplessness clouding his mind.

What could he possibly say that would make Leehan understand? How could I make him see that I love him?

The room felt colder as his thoughts drifted back to the past—back to the time when everything had started to change between them.

Years ago, Taesan had been in a relationship. Not a serious one—not like the love he felt for Leehan—but it had been something.

He had tried to move on. Tried to be with someone who wasn’t a constant ache in his heart. The girl he had dated, Nayun, had been lovely, and for a while, he thought maybe that was enough. But it was never enough.

His thoughts always returned to Leehan. The way Leehan would drift from one fling to another, always distracted, always distant, never really settling into anything real.

Leehan's in lots of relationship, maybe it wouldn't hurt if Tarsane entered one too.

Taesan tried, he really did, but he couldn’t fight the truth of his feelings. I love him. I love him so much, but he doesn’t see it. He’s not ready. He’s too...

His relationship with Nayun lasted a year. It had ended, and although they had parted on good terms, it was painful. The only reason it ended was because Taesan realized that he couldn’t give her the love she deserved.

She deserved someone who wasn’t haunted by memories of a person who had never loved him back the way he had wanted. But that wasn’t the real reason it ended.