I couldn't do anything except stare at the blank window of my quarters....for weeks.
My heart felt ripped to pieces with Mitchell being gone. It felt like like Will had been one half and him the other. Now I had no heart. And no one could live without a heart.
Every once in a while a nurse would come in to check my head, saying that it was getting better....that I could go fight again. But what was the point? What was the point of fighting if there was nothing to fight for? There was no point.
Besides the nurse, barely anyone came. They knew I needed my space and time. Ilona had come in once to force me to shower, but ended up getting no where. Cormack hadn't showed his face and I knew a visit from Gideon was near. The visit from Gideon was one I had been dreading because I knew I couldn't face him straight up. I had held him off two other times, but he had ended up sighing and leaving in silence, almost pained to see me.
My sleep was limited. The nightmares from Will were unbearable. I saw Irons torturing Mitchell in the dreams too. Sometimes Irons would turn and start attacking me, the pain actually affecting my body. I would wake up screaming and shaking. Luckily no one would come to help and I would sit on the chair the rest of the night.
I now sat in the same chair I had been in for weeks, my eyes drowsy from no sleep, and my lips dry from lack of hydration. My hair was way past disgusting and tangled like a jungle. With my ribs tight against my skin now, I was practically starving myself. The last thing I remembered eating was a forced granola bar from a nurse.
The creak of the door behind me made my shoulders tense- my senses had gotten sharper over the last few weeks. Footsteps light, the person soon shut the door behind them. Breathing deeply, I tried to remind myself to not lash out at the person. My dreams weren't real....this person wouldn't hurt me.
"Why are you still awake, Keona?" Gideon's soft voice asked.
Like I have anything else to do, Gideon.
"Still not talking? You still hate me?" Gideon grabbed a chair and sat down in front of me.
I wanted to stand up and scream at him. How he ruined my life even more than it already had been....how he stopped me from saving my best friend who loved me more than that. Gideon was dead to me. I hated him- even from the first moment I had seen him.
"We have intel on Mitchell," Gideon blinked and watched my eyes widen only slightly. "His location has been moved to some random desert, as if Irons is trying to let him rot. We don't know the exact location yet, but I promise we're close."
My hopes shattered when Gideon told me there was no exact location. What if Mitchell was never to be found? He would die a slow and painful death.
"When we look for him, do you want to go with?" Gideon continued. "It'll only be me and you. Cormack and Ilona will be trying another desert not far from ours."
Fuck off, you thought bitterly.
"Please just say something!" Gideon pleaded, kneeling in front of me. "I need to hear your voice and know you're going to be okay."
Now you're worrying about me? Fuck off again, Gideon, I snarled in my head.
"Look," Gideon took a deep breath, "clean yourself up and then go eat something. We're going to go get information on Irons. If you're not out of this room by the time we're back, I'll make sure you won't be with us searching for Mitchell."
His threat didn't bug me until after his footsteps disappeared.
~~~
I closed my eyes as the cool water ran down my throat. The hydration was already doing so much to bring me back to full health. Throwing the now empty bottle in the trash with the other four, I made myself a bagel and cream cheese. The carbs could help fatten me up.

YOU ARE READING
The Only Honor (Based on Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare)
FanfictionI continued to stare down at the message, tears threatening to spill onto it. It wasn't possible...no, it hadn't happened. The love of my life was...gone. Dead forever. ~~~ Keona Davis has been dealing with her boyfriend's passing with lots of pain...