Grow To Love You

Chapter 32: Contact

"Aubrey...can we get some ice cream?" I asked as I ran my hand over my small bump underneath my hoodie. I was now 9 weeks along. My bump was becoming visible through my shirts, not a lot but I don't want anyone knowing. I could probably get away with just wearing shirts but most of them are tight. Most people probably wouldn't think I was pregnant but I know for sure people who know me would think so as I always try keep my body in good shape.
"Sure," Aubrey squeezed my thigh and flashed a smile at me. We'd just come from the doctors. Everything is fine and we even got to hear the heart beat. The doctor gave us a picture of the ultrasound. We could make out the head, the arms and the legs. The doctor said that we can find out the sex in a few weeks once they have developed properly. I don't really know how I feel about this pregnancy. A small part of me was a little excited but mostly...I was scared. I am way too young, I am not ready at all, the situation is all messed up, this is not how I wanted a baby and especially not who I wanted to have a baby with. I hate this so much. My life is getting worse. How can I bring a child into the world. I have barely been able to look after myself lately, so to bring a child into this world would be cruel. I can never get an abortion, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I can put my child up for adoption, I again wouldn't be able to live with myself, knowing that I have a child out in the world somewhere...there's no easy way.
"The baby," I muttered.
"What about the baby? You ok?" Aubrey asked a little worried.
"No...I can't get an abortion, I can't give it up for adoption and I can't bring a child into my life...I'm not ok and neither will this baby," I wiped my tears away with the sleeve of my hoodie.
"Onika, listen to me. You are going to be an amazing mother to this child. I know that. You will also have help from me and my mother 24/7, so don't feel like this child won't have the support it needs. This child with have everything it needs and more. Don't you worry," He locked his fingers with my and pressed his lips against the back of my hand. "Everything will be ok," He dropped out hands down, still locked together as he focused on the road. We pulled into the car park and got out once we'd parked the car. "Let's just focus on keeping you and the baby healthy and happy," He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed my temple. We walked into the store and headed straight to the freezer section. "So, what ice cream does my beautiful girlfriend want?" Aubrey asked as we reached the ice cream.
"Um...can I get some of those Oreo sandwich ones and the butter pecan," I gripped on to Aubrey's arm as he grabbed the ice cream and handed me a box.
"You want anything else?" I thought for a moment.
"Pizza, I'll get it. Can we get some juice as well?" I answered.
"Of course, you get the pizza and I'll get the juice. Meet me at the self check out," He kissed my forehead before walking off. I pulled my sleeves down over my hands as I walked toward the pizza isle. As I was choosing out the pizza I wanted, I felt a hand on my back and a voice I recognised.
"Hey Nicki," I froze instantly, fear ruining through my body. "You here with anyone?" He asked.
"Drake," I turned toward him, making sure my bump wasn't visible. "You better leave before he sees you," I warned him.
"Text me sometime, we both know that Drake is just annoyed that you fucked me first," He smirked. I swallowed hard, the memories instantly entering my head.
"Jay, I didn't want to have sex with you that night. I told you I didn't but you still carried on," I wiped away a tear that had fallen down my cheek. It was the first time I had ever spoke to him about it.
"But you didn't try get away," He defended.
"I did...at first I did but you held me down so roughly, I thought it'd be best not to fight back so I wouldn't get hurt even more," I looked down at the floor, afraid to look him in the eye. "I told you to stop...more than once actually but you didn't. We were both high and drunk out of our minds but that doesn't excuse what you did. You shouldn't have taken advantage of me like that," I grabbed two pizzas. Pushing my hair behind, I held the boxes before turning to leave.
"Nic...Nicki, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to," I could tell he felt bad but that doesn't make up for what he did.
"You still raped me, I don't think I'll be able to forgive you for that. It's best you just delete my number and don't contact me again. It's what's best," I sighed before walking away. I started feeling bad. He said he didn't mean to. He had no idea what he was doing. But that can't excuse what he did. He's given me a child. A child he doesn't know about. Shit! Should I tell him? I can't tell him.
"Hey, you get it?" I looked up and saw Aubrey, too lost in my thoughts to realise how far is walked.
"Uh...yeah," I bowed my head and tucked the fallen hair behind my ear.
"Everything ok?" He asked as we walked to a checkout.
"Yeah, fine," I flashed a smile before scanning the pizzas. After we'd bought the items, we left the store and headed toward the car. As we were putting the bags in the back, I got a message.
J-Let me make it up too you, let me make it right
I pushed my phone back in my pocket before getting into the car. Aubrey started the car and pulled out of the car park.
"You sure you ok? You look a little worried?" Aubrey asked me as we turned down our street.
"Um," I debated wether or not to tell him about bumping into Jay at the store. Making my mind up I spoke just as we pulled up to the house. "We can talk about it later, I really just need to rest right now," I responded.
"Alright, you go on in and I'll bring the stuff in. You want your ice cream now?" He asked as he pulled the bags from out of the car after helping me out.
"Please," He handed me my tub of ice cream and followed me into the house. I headed down the stairs into Aubrey's room whilst he took the shopping into the kitchen. Making myself comfy in his bed, I removed my hoodie and jeans, leaving me in my underwear. I flicked on the TV and chose a movie off Netflix to watch. Soon after, Aubrey returned with my ice cream. He got into the bed beside me after handing me my ice cream and undressing down to his boxers. I ripped open the ice cream and dug in with the spoon Aubrey had brought down. "This is so good," I moaned as I swallowed the sweet ice cream.
"Haha don't eat too much," Aubrey chuckled as he swiped up some ice cream and licked it off his finger.
"Hey, that's mine," I pouted as I scooted away from him.
"I'm sorry," He leans closer to kiss me but I just pushed him away. "Aw I can't get no kiss now?" He pouted.
"No," I spooned into the ice cream and returned to watch the TV. A few minutes later I felt Aubrey's hand snake across my waist as he tried to cuddle me. I pushed him off me. "Don't touch me," I spoke sternly.
"What's wrong?" He asked as he sat up a little looking at me.
"I just don't wanna be touched," I told him as I set my ice cream down on the table beside the bed.
"Ok," I slid down into the bed more and pulled the cover up to my chin. "You wanna talk about what was up earlier?" I shook my head and turned onto my side with my back facing him.
"You sure you ok?" He asked again. He is really starting to annoy me asking me all the time of I'm ok.
"Yes, stop asking me," I snapped. I shut my eyes and fell asleep but not before hearing Drake sigh and mutter.
"It's only because I care,"