Wild Ride - The Alternative Version (Book 2)

Chapter 12~Breaking The News

*Thursday*

For the entire day on Wednesday, Jimmy was like a zombie. He'd woken up in the morning, his eyes looking completely deserted with red rings around them again, still bloodshot. His skin was pale, a ghostly pale. He barely ate, drank, or spoke, and I spent most of the day holding him because he didn't seem to want to move from his spot with me on the couch once he laid down and practically hugged my middle. Of course, when Abbie came home, he did his best to slap a smile on his face and act more like himself so she wouldn't worry, but she already had it figured out. I could see by the sorrow in her eyes that she knew he was pretending for her. When he went to bed early, before both of us even thought of sleep, Abbie asked me when he was going to get better. I had to tell her I didn't know.

Today, he went to the funeral, leaving at nine-thirty to be there by ten. I didn't go with him, even though I offered, but he told me that he'd go alone, and if he needed to be comforted the others would be there. So I let him go without any objections, and hoped that maybe after today things would start getting better. Things were already just a little better, he was less zombified and he started eating again, as well as talking. He was up before Abbie went to school, so he saw her off, giving her a hug before she left.

He was just getting back as I was coming back from the kitchen, taking care of the bowl I'd had cereal in for a late breakfast. He didn't say anything, he didn't look at me, he just walked straight into the living room and flopped face down on the couch, hugging the pillow. 

I walked over and kneeled beside him, and he knew I was there because he turned his head to look at me. With tears in his eyes, he just stared back at me for a little while, wanting to say something but I'm guessing he didn't know what he wanted to say. Finally, he just said,

"She's really gone. Six feet under. Just like that." I knew now he was starting to accept Jasmine's death, but he was still in shock.

I got up and had him move over so I could sit with him on the couch, and eventually he ended up laying across my lap, on his back, just staring up at the ceiling. But even though there were tears in his eyes, he didn't cry. I think he wanted to, but he'd done so much crying in the past few days that he couldn't get anymore tears out. We stayed in silence for a long time after that, and he turned in towards me a little. But he did speak again, and I realized he'd been in deep thought during our silence.

"I'll probably never date again." He said quietly.

I looked at him. "Sure you will. After a while, you'll be ready to date again, and you'll want to, too."

"But I'd feel so guilty... and afraid that if we broke up, it would happen all over again." He looked away. 

"Jimmy, you can't think like that. Just because it happened this once does not mean it will happen again, and it most likely won't. And you might feel guilty at first, but then you won't anymore after a little while."  I told him.

"Well, if I do, I'd have to know already that the girl is very special. She'd have to have a very high rate of being the 'one'." Jimmy replied. I didn't argue with him about that one, knowing that eventually he'd come around to dating again, no matter how he has to do it. And if that's it, then that's fine. 

After a little while, he said, "I'm going to have to tell the others soon about Abbie, before they find out on their own and question why I didn't tell them. I don't want them to feel like I'm hiding anything, especially with what's going on. But I don't know when the right time would be. I mean, someone that had been a part of our family just died by her own will. How do I spring it on them the happy news of the existance of my daughter?" 

"They'll all be hurting from this for some time, but you can't put it off either. I say you just do it somehow in between, and hope for the best. That's what I would do." I replied.