Wild Ride - The Alternative Version (Book 2)

Chapter 56~Always Keep Me Close

Elise's POV

I was sitting on the couch, kicking back and reading a book while Jimmy was downstairs in the basement, working on a song he'd been writing for a while now. We'd just ate lunch maybe ten minutes ago, and then he disappeared down there. Apparently he got this idea while he was on tour with the guys a few months ago, and he's been spending quite a bit of time downstairs working on it. Eventually, he'll bring it to the guys in the studio and they'll be able to take it even further. I'm sure, with him creating the idea, whatever it is he's got will be great once it's completely finished.

Things have been kind of rough around here for the past couple of months, though. Jimmy and I have kind of been slowly growing apart in the last five years, and we've recently started fighting quite often. We got married about a year after Abbie went away, and things were great despite the fact that even at that point we were both still in this kind of mourning-type state. Three months after our marriage, having been conceived before we were married, we had our second child, Kaylee Jade Sullivan. A month before Jimmy left for tour, we found out that we would be expecting another child. While he was just at the end of his tour, I was told that we were to have a little boy this time, but unfortunately that never happened. It wasn't long after Jimmy had come home that we'd lost the baby. If we hadn't, it probably would've been right around this time or a little later that he would've been born. Both of us were torn all apart inside, and that went for Kaylee too because she'd been excited to have a younger sibling. The wound left on my heart has slowly started to heal, but I don't think Jimmy's even started to heal yet. I've been so afraid he'd fall into a depression again, he doesn't deal well with loss and I've tried to help him as much as I could, but that's also where a lot of the fighting started.

Kaylee be four next month, on the 7th. Kaylee is a lot like Abbie, she looks like her and she acts like her. She's very smart for her age, and so sometimes people already mistake her for being well into four years old when she's actually not going to be four until next month.

When we found out that I was pregnant with her, we were both just kind of unsure of what to do. I had been afraid to tell Jimmy, but it was something that I couldn't keep from him because sooner or later he'd find out, and he's my husband. I'm not supposed to keep that sort of thing from him, not that I really wanted to. I just wasn't sure how he'd react. He was happy, and so was I, but we were both afraid that with it being so soon, she'd be taken from us too. But nobody ever came to say that she was going to have to be taken from us or anything after she was born. It was hard at first, because we were both still hurting and we hadn't really meant to have another child so soon, but this wouldn't be the first time. However, we knew that we had to take on the roles of parents again because we wouldn't abandon that child or have her grow up with parents who just didn't care enough. So we just kind of forced ourselves into moving on when we found out. 

But that didn't mean that we didn't still stop and think about her whenever we were doing something. We still do that to this day. A lot of the times late at night when Kaylee was a baby, and I'd gotten up to comfort her when she cried in the middle of the night, I would think about what kind of a sister Abbie would be to Kaylee. There were times when I was at work and I'd think about when she was younger, and I'd bring her with me when she didn't have school, and she'd run around giving plenty of entertainment to those around her. A lot of every day things triggered memories of her, and for a while they'd bring tears to our eyes. Now we just smile and be thankful that we have those memories in the first place. 

So, together we focused on raising Kaylee and then on the side he focused on music and I focused on my job. I've been working later quite a bit recently, out at concerts and such, and I was at one last night. I've been kind of tired all day even though I slept in, so I'm just trying to spend my Saturday relaxing before I have to get back to work again Monday. The concerts are going to start coming less now starting this coming week, but I manage three bands and two of them had a bunch of shows this past week.