His Lover's Killer

It's Complicated

(Steve's POV)

After the long lonely walk home, I finally got to my crappy little apartment room that I shared with Lucas. Lucas... He's suppose to come home tonight, which scared me even more. I didn't want to be with him, I know understood what Nick was telling me earlier. Lucas was a bad sign but I couldn't leave him... We had this sort of deal we had going on, it wasn't a relationship, just pleasure. Well it was for his pleasure, I wasn't too fond of it. But I couldn't back down or he'll hurt me again. I know I mess up a lot in the relationship, but it cost me. For instance, if I forfeited one of our... episodes if I could even call it that, he was not pleased. I'd rather made some stupid mistakes in my life, and this was one of the big ones. Having to be in a sexual abusive relationship with a guy who was too much for me.

As I opened the door to the room, my whole body was shaking. I didn't know if he was already home or if he's coming later. But to my relief, the room was empty and quiet. Too quiet actually.

"Lucas?" I said to the room, just making sure he wasn't here. He wasn't.

Sighing of relief, I closed the door behind me quietly and walked over to the bed. Sitting on the edge of it, I laid down my back so I could get a few second of relaxation until the devil himself comes back here. No doubt was I scared of Lucas, his presents around myself made me feel... like I was just some sort of toy. I felt like I was that for him for months, but ever since I've been with Nick, my realization to this title was uncomfortable. I didn't want to feel like this anymore, I wanted to mean something towards someone. Like how Nick sees me.

My body tensed up as I heard the door being open and I sat up my frozen spine. My heart sped up as I saw Lucas entered. He was looking down but when he glanced up, the glaring started again, as well as his annoyance silence.

"Welcome back!" I tried to be optimistic of his returned, trying to make it less awkward like always. But he said nothing, just kept glaring at me like I've done something terrible... again.

He just slowly walked towards me, slamming the door behind him, making me jump. I didn't know what he was going to do, it could be anything. I obviously up-setted him, but then again, he was always upset.

"Where've you been?" He asked as he walked closer towards me, still glaring. He never answers my questions, but if I didn't answer his quick enough, that was it for me.

I swallowed hard, fake smiling at him. "Oh me? I uh, was just, uhm... Visiting a friend..." I looked down, my body started to shake as Lucas came closer towards me.

"A friend huh? Let me guess, that detective." His tone told me that he was pissed, like always. He was never happy with what I did without him, or rather with him any time.

Nodding slowly, my lips were trembling. I knew he didn't like Nick and he was very upset with me that I saw him without his permission. But regardless, I had to be with Nick, he made me feel more as a person than Lucas did.

"Y-yes... B-but I-I had to! He's hurt r-really badly and-" I tried to explain but Lucas wasn't having it. He gripped my arms, pulled me up, and I was facing his killer anger, just like the one that Jake gave me when I first met him.

"Sure he is." Lucas growled as he rolled his eyes. Knowing that he could've cared less about Nick made me regret that I even mentioned him.

I squealed a bit as Lucas shoved me back on the bed, making me feel paralyzed. I knew I shouldn't have said anything about Nick, but now I was going to pay the consequence. Shutting my eyes closed, I could feel Lucas's heavy breathing near me, making start to shiver.

"I wonder how bad he really is since you had to watch over him." The tightness of his grip on my arms told me that it was already over with, pretending to be strong for myself and for Nick has long passed and I was back to being my scary cat little self. My heart was racing at the speed of sound, pounding in my chest as my nerves shook me.

Lucas smirked as he saw that I was still afraid of him. "Not so tough now, huh?"

Chills went through my whole body as I felt the touch of his sharp fingernails on my skin. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream for help but I knew no one would hear, no one cared enough; the only person who did was gone. No, not gone... He just couldn't hear me anymore.

I winced as Lucas shook me to make me get back into the reality that scared me.

"Pay attention dammit! God how many time do I have to tell you, idiot?!" He was angry, this wasn't going to end well.

As I was being scolded, I looked down with tears pouring down my face but they quickly disappeared when Lucas looked into my eyes.

"Stop acting like this! It's selfish." He growled and shoved me hard on the bed as he walked towards the bathroom, slamming the door shut.

Just within those 15 minutes everything went back to the way it was. The silence, the abuse and the lonesome has all returned, never would I have ever known that it was back, haunting my soul. I rolled over towards my side of the bed and curled my body up in the sheets. My breathing has been choppy mixed with the crying that I have yet to control.

I wanted, no, I needed Nick to come back because I love him dearly. But now I knew that we could never be together. Even if he woke up from his coma, I don't think that we would be able to have something special together, just like he and Jessica did. But maybe he's happy now.... Maybe he's finally with her and happy to be gone... I hope he was happy, but then again, my selfishness wishes that he could come back and be with me, like I always dreamed of. As my eyes started to drift close, my dreams of Nick made me think more positive about his health and future.