one girl. one past.

MY FAULT

Its been three months no sign of josh and henry don't know a thing now I also work at the downtown theaters every Monday Tuesday and wensday I work to keep my mind off things and through the weekend I spend it watching movies with jessie and victoria witch they don't even watch the movie there to busy sharing spit. When they start to get touchy feely I get the moto and leave. Its saterday and jessie called me and said they wouldn't be home tonight so I'm setting at my house watching the news nothing new and worth watching though. I fall asleep cuddling my pellow again. I wake up hearing a knock at the door I get up and clear my eyes to answer the door but it was already answered jake was standing in the living room "hey just had bad feeling wanted to come check on you" he says I smile he sets on the couch by me "so how you been?" He says nervously playing with a torns string on my pants "well I am doing okay I guess" I say watching him "kk you been so busy I didn't know when to tell you this" he says I look at him in cunfusion "kk I well um I want you back I can't sleep I can barley eat I can't stop thinking about you" he says I put my hand over his mouth stopping him "shh jake don't do this you know I can't do that I love josh" I say he nods "but he left you?" He says "he didn't know the truth and when he comes back you can tell him nothing happened" I say smiling "kk he's not coming back he's gone I don't want you hurt that's why I'm telling you this kk I love you and I care I will always be here he won't he is gone" he says a tear runs down my face as my smile fades away as I come back to reality maybe he's right I mean he did leave me he's gone he was with my freakin uncle and he knew it he avoided me he never loved me at all. Jake hugs me "I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you I swear I meant nothing bad I just want you back please give me a second chance" he says I shove my face in his chest crying. He rubs my head "I didn't mean to im sorry I promise I won't let him hurt you again" he says kissing my head I close my eyes and let him hold me. I fall asleep later I wake up in his arms I start to get up and he pulls me back into my arms "please don't go you looked so beautiful" he says I lay back down what's the use in fighting it. He rubs my back with his hand "I wish this was real" he says I look at him cunfussed "I know you love him you can see it in your eyes I can never fully have you" he says caressing my face with his hand I look away "I'm sorry" I say to him he kisses my cheek "I will take what I can get as long as I'm with you" he says I smile a fake smile he kisses my neck then falls asleep. I slip myself out of his arms and I take a shower and clean the wounds then I bandage them again and slip into some skinny jeans and and a tank top and my hoodie and I slip my hood on and deside to go for a walk after walking for a couple of hours I head back henry stops his car by me "hey shouldn't you be at home?" He says I smile and look up at the dark sky "yaeh I guess so" I say "want a ride?" He asks "sure" I say shrugging my sholders and getting in the car "so where you been?" He asks "working keeping myself busy" I say gazing out the window "I seen your friend a few days ago you know the one you were asking about" he says I turn and look at him in excitement" where? when? Did he talk to you? Was he okay?" I say asking him questions in excitement "calm down I said I seen him we got a call on him and some guys they was stirring up some trouble with some locals" he says rolling his eyes "oh" i say "yaeh he gave us some trouble we ended up arresting him and some other guy and keeping them for a couple of weeks" he says sounding kind of annoyed "I'm sorry" I say "he isn't I good kid why are you even friends with a guy like that?" He says to me stopping the car I look down at my feet "I don't even know anymore" I say as a tear runs down my face he doesn't and never will care or come back. I knew I shouldn't have trusted him ever I hate him! I get out of the car in anger he grabs my wrist and pulls my face to his are lips meet he kisses me my eyes widen in shock then I break the kiss "I'm sorry" he says blushing. He closes the door for me and drives off leaving me standing there in shock. I slowly feel a smile spread acrossed my face. I hide it with my hand what am I thinking no I'm not going to let feelings find there way back to me. I walk to my apartment and head inside jake is laying on the couch still asleep I smile and head to my bed and go to sleep. The next day I wake up to the smell of food I jump up and change into a mini skirt and a long sleeve sweat shirt. I head to the kitchen where jake is cooking I smile "so the man can cook wow what other suprises does he have?" I say giggling "you'll never know if you loose me" he says with a laigh not looking up from cooking then he grabs two plates and fixing up some eggs and toast I set and we both eat it. I barley eat anything "well you can tell me if it taste bad" he says "no its not that I just well henry said he seen josh he didn't just see him he arrested him they were fighting with some people and gave the cops some trouble" I say playing with my food "he doesn't even care to come see how you are he doeant bother to call and see how you are can't you see he don't care I do" he says grabbing my hand and sticking it on his chest "this heart beats for you" a tear runs down my face I get up "I'm going to take a walk" I say I slip on some black leggings and a black long sleeve shirt and my hoodie and walk out he grabs my hand "kk I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you" he says "I'm fine I just have to think"I say slipping my hood on and heading into the rain.