Forever Yours (Book 4 of 4) (Justin Bieber Love Story) ✔️

Chapter 8: Meant To Be

SERRINA

Amelia was more than excited to go to Ashley to meet the new baby. We had both been busy the last few weeks, her with a baby, me with 3 kids and a massive house to take care of. I practically had to run to keep up with my youngest daughter and she giggled as my feet thumped on the pavement behind her. When we reached the front door she gently knocked as I had told her to incase the baby was sleeping.

Ashley opened the door and smiled, "Hey guys."

Amelia threw her arms around Ashley's legs, "Hi Aunty Ashley. Can I see Greyson now?"

We all laughed and Ashley nodded, "Of course you can, but he's sleeping. We have to be quiet, okay?" She held her finger to her lips in a 'sh' motion and Amelia nodded and copied her. We followed Ashley through the front door and into the main living room. a small cot was set up where I could see a tiny baby squirming. Amelia reached it first and pressed both of her hand onto the side as she peered over the edge. I could see her smile from across the room, "Oh, he's so cute." She turned to me and laughed, "Even cuter than me!"

I reached her and put my hands on her shoulders, looking over at the little baby in cot. He looked the same as Oliver did, so a lot like Ashley. She stared down at him with a sad smile.

"Whats wrong?" I whispered to her as Amelia poked at Greyson's feet, "You look mad."

She held up four fingers on her left hand, "Four." She said and then shook her head, "He's been out of me for almost 3 weeks and Chaz has held him 4 times." I could see the exhaustion in her eyes as she stared down at the infant, "He was so excited about the new baby and now he's just..." She shrugged unsure of what to say, "Absent?" She shrugged like she wasn't sure what else to say, "He's there for Ollie but not for me."

I nodded in complete understanding of what she felt, except, my kids didn't see Justin either, "Justin is making music again."

Her eyes went wide and she crossed her arms, "Since when? How long have you known?"

I shook my head and shrugged, "He told me a few days ago." I bit my lip, ran my hands through Amelia's hair then turned to Ashley and lowered my voice, "I don't know what to say to them."

"Don't say anything," Her voice was a whisper backhand she shrugged, "Its his stupid choice. Now he's gotta own up to it."

"Mommy," Amelia looked over to me and smiled, "Can you have another baby? I want a baby brother or sister."

I smiled, "Maybe one day."

She was content with the answer and nodded, "Okay." And went back to watching Greyson while I thought about what Ashley had said and how true it was.

******

Amelia was distracted with the iPad while Ashley and I sat at the dining room table, Greyson latched to her breast as we spoke. I couldn't stop staring at him, his tiny mouth and eyes, the skin so soft it felt like velvet. His hair was halfway between blonde and brunette and when his eyes were open you could see they were becoming a deep green.

"I miss it," I whispered to her and reached over to touch Greyson's fine hair, "Having a baby. It's been so long."

She smiled as her son stared up at her, "Weren't you guys trying? What happened?"

I thought for a minute then shrugged, "I don't know. We got tired of losing." I bit my cheek, "You know about the miscarriage, right?"

She sheepishly nodded, "Yeah," her fingers combed over her sons hair, "I was already 4 months with Greyson. It was hard for me too."

I nodded, knowing it was. She had been excited at the possibility of have more kids so close together in age. When I lost the baby she was just as devastated as I was. I saw Greyson turn his head away from her boob and Ashley tucked it away, handing the baby to me.

"Can you watch him for a few? I have to pee." She stood up and sighed, "I'm still bleeding. Meghan said it's normal but it's exhausting."

Suddenly my heart stopped and my stomach began to fill with butterflies, "Oh my God." I lifted a hand to cover my mouth and looked down at the baby in my arms then back up at Ashley, "My period." She seemed completely lost with my choppy sentences so I took a deep breath and smiled, "Ash, I haven't gotten my period."

She immediately knew what I was saying and began to smile, "I've got a test in the bathroom. Wanna take it?"

I took a deep breath and nodded.

******

I stood in the bathroom, the plastic stick between my thumb and pointer finger still thinking. Ashley was bouncing Greyson and gently patting his back while Amelia watched some cartoon in the living room.

"Has it been long enough?" I mumbled and tapped the test against the bathroom counter, "I feel like we've been waiting forever."

She looked down at her phone timer and laughed, "Its only been 47 seconds."

I rolled my eyes and groaned, "Feels like an hour." I blew out a deep breath and ran my fingers through my hair. Suddenly a thought broke through my head and I began to feel nauseous - or maybe it was morning sickness, "Ashley, what am I going to do with a baby? Justin isn't even home anymore."

She shrugged and rubbed Greyson's cheek, "Chaz is gone too but I'm dealing. Its not easy." She glanced up at me and smiled, "But you can do it, Serrina."

I touched my stomach, an inch below my belly button and closed my eyes, "I know I can, but I don't want to do it alone." I shrugged and gently shook my head, "I remember how hard it was with Taylor. He worked all the time. Even with the twins. Their first year he was working all the time." I scoffed and shook my head, "Sometimes I still feel like Im recovering from that." I shrugged, "It just kills me to think he's going to miss out on a new baby..." I shrugged and gently shook my head, "Again."

"Why don't you tell him that?"

As I opened my mouth to reply, her phone began to ring, signalling the end of the alarm. It didnt even cross my mind that the test might be negative so I looked down at it without hesitating and my heart instantly shattered. It must ave shown on my ace because Ashley was stepping closer and looked over my arm.

"Oh," She sighed and pressed her hand to my back, "Im sorry, Serrina."

I shook my head and dropped the negative test into the trash can, "No, maybe its just not meant to be." I noticed my hand was still poking at my stomach and pulled it away, "I should grab Amelia and get going."

She didnt fight me, probably knowing that I needed to leave. I was emotional and had to come to terms with not having any more kids.

But like I said, it probably wasn't meant to be.