Forever Yours (Book 4 of 4) (Justin Bieber Love Story) ✔️

Chapter 38: The Pain

~ 32 Weeks Pregnant ~

Serrina

I rolled over and immediately winced. Justin must have just gotten up and was standing in front of his dresser picking out a pair of pants to wear for the day. I sat up and pressed my hand into my lower back, the origin of pain that started at my spine and wrapped around into my sternum, making it hard to breathe.

"Hey, sorry." Justin must have noticed I was awake and was walking over to the bed. He bent over, kissing my forehead, "Did I wake you up?" I gently shook my head and leaned forward in pain. Justin frowned and sat down beside me, pushing his hand under mind and pressing into the spot I had just been holding, "You okay?"

Whatever he was doing was helping a little bit and I was above to sit up straight, but I still shook my head, "I'll be okay. Connor's coming by later to hang out. He can help with the kids." Then I blew out a deep breath and I reached around to move his hand in circles. He caught my drift and began rubbing large circles on my lower back, "You've got a couple interviews today, right?"

He slowly nodded and changed the direction he was rubbing on my back, "Yeah, there's a radio show in an hour and a half. I think I'm on Ellen at 10 and I have a meeting with my team at 3 to go over final details of the album." He bit his lip and pressed his forehead on mine, "I'll be home by 6 at the absolute latest."

He was worrying about me.

I pushed him back a little and smiled through the pain, trying to show him that I wasn't as bad as I was, but he didn't move from his spot on the bed. I made a joke to lighten the mood, "If you have an interview in an hour and a half you need to put pants on."

He looked down at his boxers and shrugged, "Well, its radio. I figured pants were optional." Then he smiled and raised his eyebrows at me.

"Put pants on you dork." I pulled my legs over the edge of the bed and went to stand up. As I put my weight on my legs my knees gave out and I fell to my knees, both of them made sickening cracking noises as I hit the ground.

"Oh my god," Justin was on the floor beside me so quickly it made my head spin a little, "What happened?" He gasped, grabbing my shoulder and face, "Are you okay?"

I nodded, not sure what had just happened. My legs were still shaky but I gripped the bedpost and Justin to keep myself balanced as I got back to my feet, then sat back down on the bed, "My centre of balance is off I guess." Then I laughed even though my knees were throbbing and my back pain was making it hard to breathe. He had to leave now or he was going to be late, "I'll see you tonight?"

He was watching me with concern but took a deep breath and then nodded, "If you need me for anything, call. I will come straight home." I nodded and pulled the blanket back over my lap, knowing my legs weren't strong enough to move me anywhere and knowing that he would cancel everything if I fell one more time, "I love you."

"I love you too." I blew him a kiss and watched as he pulled on a pair of pants and left the room.

******

When Connor got to our house he must have noticed I wasn't up yet and came straight to my room. I hadn't moved from the spot Justin had left me in because the pain had gotten worse and my feet were numb and tingly. I hadn't even noticed him come in the room until  he was crouched in front of me, holding my swollen, red knees. I was taking long deep breaths and he stared up at me in fear.

"Are you okay?" He was trying to get my attention but I was so focused on the pain that I couldn't hear his words, "Breathe, babe. You'll be fine."

I did my best to listen to his advice, breathe, and it seemed to work for a while. The tears that had started to spring up in my eyes and stopped and I looked down at him with pain, "I need you to watch the kids."

He frowned and nodded his head, "Okay?" Then he looked straight at me and sighed, "Where are you gonna go? Can you even drive right now?"

I bit my cheek, "Im going to see Meghan." I pressed my palm into my back and bit my bottom lip, "Jasper has been then most active baby and I haven't felt him moving for a few days. Now I'm in a lot of pain." I swallowed the lump that was forming in my throat and smiled, "I just need to make sure he's okay." My voice cracked as I spoke and he nodded in agreement. It took me a few seconds to relax enough to move my legs and when I put them on the ground I felt the same way I had earlier, "Can you help me get up?"

Connor stood up out of his crouch and moved so he was standing in front of me. He held out his hands for me and I grabbed them, hoisting myself up and then gripping onto his forearms for support. He swayed a little bit but managed to keep me standing long enough for my legs to remember what standing was like and for feeling to return to my toes. I had never felt like this during any of my previous pregnancies so I was terrified. My whole body hurt and I my brain kept drawing me to the word:

Miscarriage.

My heart was hurting almost as much as my body and I needed to go see somebody who would tell me everything was okay.

Connor helped me get dressed and I ended up wearing the only clothes of mine that still fit, a pair of low rise, light grey yoga capris and a very fitted tank top. Connor gave me his jacket because it was baggy and comfortable and then he helped me put on a pair of sneakers. When we walked out of the room and past my kids I did my best to act normal but I had to keep a hand on Connor for support.

"Mom?" Braxton leaned over the back of the couch and stared at me, "Where are you going?"

I looked back at them and saw all three of my kids were staring at me from the couch. I bit my cheek, "Im just going..." I didn't know what to say. If I told them Meghan they would freak out but I didn't want to lie.

"She has a doctors appointment, remember?" Connor smiled at them, "That's why Im here. To hang out while mom is gone." Braxton took he bait, nodded and went back to his show. Connor turned back to me and blocked me from the kids, "Are you going to be okay? We can call Justin's mom to watch them and I can drive."

"No," I shook my head and took a deep breath, "I don't want to freak her out. Don't tell anybody whats going on until I get back. I don't need people freaking out if this is just me over reacting."

He nodded and kissed the top of my head, "Keep me updated." I nodded and grabbed my car key, "Drive safe."

I left the house and stumbled out to the car. The door was heavier than I remembered and it took all my might to shove it open and climb in. Once I was in I jammed the key into the ignition and started the engine. I pulled my seatbelt on, regardless of how uncomfortable it was and pulled out of the driveway.

The more I drove the more the pain moved to my tailbone. Every bump I hit sent an intense pain up my spine and made my lungs burn. I took a deep breath and stopped at a red light. A few cars pulled up behind me and I turned on the radio. Katy Perry blasted through the speakers and distracted me a little bit but not enough to distract me from the pain. The light changed and I let my foot off the brake and began rolling into the intersection.

Maybe it was the pain in my back that was keeping me distracted and my focus off the road.

Maybe it was the loud music that drowned out the squealing tires.

But it wasn't.

It was a reckless driver looking down at his phone.

I wonder if he knew he would hit my car.

I wonder if he knew that, today, everybody's lives would change.

The last thing I remembered was seeing the bright white lights and hearing the loud horn as his truck collided into the passenger side door and sent my car into oncoming traffic.