Hunger

Hunger 05/18/2013 Saturday

Hunger

By Mark Alan Trimeloni

Continued on 5/18/2013

My name is John and I'm a food addict.

May 18th 2013

1:55pm

This has been a pretty good week. I weighed in yesterday at 324 lbs. See the video. I've lost 6 lbs in four days. This is common in the beginning before my weight loss slows down.

I've been walking with my mom. On Wednesday we went twice around the park. I was stiff as hell when I got home, but it was worth it. The temptation to stop at one time around is so great. Helps to have my mom around. She talks quite a bit. Makes the exercise go quicker and seem less strenuous.

We also walked on Friday with two more trips around the park. This time I didn't suffer the stiffness of the Wednesday walk. My body is adapting to the new lifestyle.

I ate a little more than I was supposed to on Wednesday and Thursday. About 100 to 150 calories more. On Wednesday night I was so hungry I couldn't stand it. So I had a cup of cereal. I did the same thing on Thursday after I had eaten my 1200 calories. The extra hasn't hurt me as evidenced by the weigh in.

On Thursday I started getting this idea about taking a day off on Saturday and getting myself some chicken, mashed potatos, and gravy. I love the chicken at this fast food outlet. I also considered getting a pizza. My favorite pizza with pepperoni, bacon, and extra cheese. Then I would stop at the store and get some donuts or some other baked good. I would make a day of it. I haven't done this yet. It's Saturday and I haven't got the same urge to do so. The anticipation of the food is far more pleasing than actually getting and eating it. I think I'll be alright. We'll have to wait until my next journal to find out. I still have a long night ahead.

Reasons I haven't gone on a Saturday binge. I don't want to go back to going to the bathroom up to 15 times a day. Right now, I go to the bathroom about 3 or 4. I don't want to spend the money. The trip would cost around $20 in food if I gave in. Right now, I am not spending more than around that much a week on food. I don't want to waste the gas. I don't want to feel sluggish, sedate, unproductive anymore. I have been getting a lot done as you can tell. I am posting all over the place my works. I managed to get my horror novel on a free site for download to mobile devices. Something I've been wanting to do for a long time. I wrote the next part of my latest horror novel Abuse and it is really good. Probably my best work. I just don't want to be a slave to food anymore. I don't want to buy it. Drag it into the house and eat it. I have my energy back. At times I can feel my feet again. They've been numb for so long. I need to focus on getting through this day. My mind does this. Makes me feel there is no threat then I go out, buy food, and eat it in a haze. Afterwards, I wonder what the hell happened.

Wish me luck.