Insecure

08

July 5, 2015

Dear Diary,

When are we gonna stop moving? I'm tired of it. Hopefully this'll be the last time.

Anyway this is our last day and me being me, I'm gonna be watching youtube videos and eating pizza. And, yes I know had pizza a few days ago but I can't get enough.

It's really hard for me to say this but...I have a pizza obession.

Long story short, I don't want to lift any boxes so, while everyone else is loading things then, I'll be here watching the children.

When did my life become so predictable?

"What are you watching" Lamar asks. "Teen Wolf" I say and he carries on. This is my second time watching teen wolf, I don't know why I couldn't get into it until now but it's a hell of show.

We leave tomorrow and I need as much sleep as I can get but thanks to teen wolf, I don't think I'll be getting any tonight. And yes, instead of actually watching the girls while they get everything on the truck, I will be writing in my thought and feelings book while there are commercials so feel free to tell me what to do with my life.

"Please watch your sisters" my mom says and groan very loudly before gathering them and making them watch my show.

"I'll feed you, if you seat here and be quiet" I say. "Okay" they both say. Truth is none of us get to eat until their finished which kinda of motivates me to want to help them so can eat.

Selfish? Maybe I'm just worried about the kids going hungry. I seriously doubt you'll ever really know the truth.

Will anyone ever really know the real me not that cold hearted bitch they think I am? Then again no one tries to get to know me so, cold hearted bitch it is then.

Sarah-Jane Hines

*35 minutes later*

"I'm gonna go get the pizza now. Can you bathe them so they eat and go to bed" my mom asks and I nod. Grace can wash herself so I need about 5 minutes to wash Faythe.

I'll have my pizza and new Teen Wolf by 9:00. I look at my clock and see I have 15 minutes and since mom left, we're good to go.

"Get your towels, Grace" I say and she does while I head to the bathroom with Faythe and fix their water.

A few minutes later Grace comes to the bathroom with their towels and gets in the tub. I wash up Faythe and then get her out of the tub allowing Grace to play in the water.

"Wash up so you can eat" I say and she nods. I take Faythe to room and get her dressed. 5 more minutes. As my mom walks through the door, Grave gets out of the tub and gets dressed while I get my food and a drink and head back to my room just in time.