Until Dawn (Josh x OC)

Chapter 18: Lies and Confusion.

My dreams were filled with horrible visions and images, as I felt as if it was a reminder of everything that had gone on these past couple of days.

Although, the only thing that managed to awaken me from my intense nightmares was the sound of Josh's quiet voice. He was talking on the phone to someone very quietly, almost as if he didn't want me to hear what he was saying.

"Yes..yes. I can't speak right now, I..I have company." He whispered.
"I will see you as soon as I can leave. I promise. I love you, see you later. Love you." He whispered quieter, but every word felt like a lasting sting that had pierced through my chest, from anxiety and mostly the accusation I had made, from fearing the unknown.

He sounded far away, like he was in the next room, hiding himself away from me. I could see him walk back to his room, with a hand covering his eyes in stress, "Oh good morning beautiful!" I heard his voice echo through my ears, but I found it extremely hard to reply.

"'M-morning." I said, trying to restrain my emotions, and tears.
"What's wrong?" He quickly asked me.
I knew I should have questioned him about it, just incase it wasn't a big deal, but I felt as if I couldn't. He was the only thing keeping me happy at the moment, and I didn't want to ruin it by asking him questions.

"Uhm..I think I need to go home." I muttered, as I got out of Josh's bed. I bent down to the floor to pick up my clothes, as I was getting dressed again.
"Why? You can say with me here for a bit." He looked at me with a massive amount of confusion, as he was utterly puzzled.

"I just got to-" I said, rushing to put my clothes on, as I ran to the door. Trying to leave as quickly as I could.
Josh didn't seem happy with that, as he kept shouting my name out in confusion. "Lauren? Lauren!"

My hands were shaking in fear, as I reached for the handle of the front door, I felt so vulnerable now to everything around me. Like I had nothing, or that nobody cared.

Josh's hand gripped onto my shoulder, as he attempted to turn me around. "Leave me alone josh." My eyes started to tear up, as I felt overall so emotionally drained.

My mind was thinking in detail of who he was talking to on the phone. He must have been talking to another girl, I knew it. He doesn't like me and I am just going to get hurt again. I have to get away from him while I can. Nobody loves me, and nobody ever will.

I ran to my car, as I jumped in there immediately. I still heard josh calling my name out in confusion, but I ignored him in fead, as I drove off.

Suddenly, I started to cry dramatically in the car, my body felt so limp, mainly because I had felt so empty inside.

*beep* *beep* *beep*
Josh was ringing me, in fact he had rang me over ten times just as I was driving. I didn't have the guts to pick up the phone.

I couldn't stop myself from crying, I had felt like the only good thing in my life was taken away from me, because I know I don't deserve anything good, I don't deserve happiness.

Another phone call interrupted my thoughts, but this time it wasn't josh, it was mike. I decided to answer it.
"Hello..mike?" My voice was still slightly shaking from the previous tears.
"Hey Lauren! I was calling to ask if you wanted to come over mine tonight, we are getting everyone together a fuck load of people to celebrate the lives that Emily, matt and..and Jessica lived." I could still hear the tone of sadness in his voice, where I felt as if I had to help.
"You know it's not really my thing." I admitted, awkwardly.
"Please Lauren..for me, and for all of our lost friends." He said, which made me want to cry again.
"S-sure.." I said anxiously.

The tone of his voice returned to its original upbeat manner. "Thank you Lauren..I have rang josh as well, he seems pretty pissed off, he said he'd only go if you were going..so now I can tell him the good news. Is everything okay with you two?" He asked me, concerned.
"I don't even know right now.." I whispered, feeling upset.