Run Away Forever

Chapter Four

Avery

Jack and I make no plans to meet up for the rest of the summer. The first time I see him after sleeping together is in town with my other best friend Kelly.

I loved Kelly, she had this amazing bubbly personality. We met the first day of middle school and instantly connected. We've been best friends ever since. I told her everything, even the stuff I didn't tell Jack. She even knew that I was interested in Jack at one point but she believed that had gone away.

We were coming out of Victoria's Secret when we bumped into him, we had just bought some new underwear for the next school year, our senior year. Jack had been walking past when I crashed into him, just like I did when we first met a few years ago.

We stared at each other awkwardly for a moment, I could tell that Kelly was looking in between us with confusion. "Hey Jack," Kelly bubbly.

"You okay, Kel?" he asked her ignoring me for a moment.

"Yeah, I'm good. I haven't seen you in a while."

"I've been busy preparing for college."

"Cool," Kelly smiled.

Jack then turned to me and gave me a small smile but awkwardly greats me, "Hey Ave."

"Jack," I nodded back. "So what are you doing in town?"

"Just picking up some new covers for my bed, for my dorm room. All I have to do now is pack and I'll be ready to go. So what's up with you?" he told me.

"I'm fine, I can't wait for senior year, so I can finally go to college and get away from this place," I said to him truthfully. "I'm going to miss you when you're gone." I really was going to miss him, more than I do now, I loved going to see him whenever I needed to.

"Yeah I'm going to miss you too. Anyway I've got to go, I'll see you around," he said walking off like he couldn't wait to get away.

"That was awkward," Kelly pointed out, "What happened between you guys? One day you're as close as can be but now you can barely talk to each other."

"Nothing happened, Kelly, we've just grown apart over the summer, we've both been busy with other things that we haven't had time for each other." I tried to avoid the subject of Jack, I didn't want the pain in my chest to worsen any more than it already had.

"Right like you can grow apart from the guy who's always been there for you in the last four years."

I said nothing in return, I couldn't tell her what really happened, could I? She didn't need to know about our amazing weekend, and how he had taken my virginity.

"We weren't that close, really," I lied to her.

"Avery you spent almost every weekend together and spent most of your lunch periods together, I think you were close. Plus you did crush on him earlier in the year, I'm you still like him."

"I don't," I answered quickly, but it wasn't kind of the truth.

"Stop lying to yourself Ave, you know it's going to hurt when he leaves."

Surprising myself I answer, "It already hurts, I know he's never going to feel the same way as I do, that's why I stopped hanging out with him because I can't bear to think about him with other girls he meets at college."

"Why don't you tell him?" she said sincerely.

"Because he's not my friend any more, and if I told him he wouldn't want to be friends with me."

"He loves you," she said sitting down on the fountain in the middle of the mall.

"He may love me but only as a friend," I said her as I sat down beside her. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."

A few weeks later Jack left for college. I didn't know he had left until I ran into his Mom at the local Walmart and she asked me why I didn't come to his going away party. I just told her that I was busy and couldn't make it unfortunately.

I missed him so much, I didn't realise what I had until it was gone, and I regretted not telling him how I felt. I was such an idiot. I wanted him here just so I could tell him how I felt, I wanted him more than I had ever wanted anyone before.

I loved him.

Jack

I didn't want to leave her. But I had too. I couldn't have these feelings for her because it would just ruin us and she didn't feel the same way about me. I had to distance myself from her.

I knew that once I started college I would have to use other girls so I could just forget about her, I already hated thinking that but I knew it was the only way.

I needed to forget her. We would never be anything.

Even so, I was disappointed when she didn't turn up to my going to college party, I'd thought that she would turn up. Her parents were there but she wasn't. I spent most of my time getting drunk off beer and talking to my friends, trying to forget her.

No matter what I did that night I couldn't forget her. I could still taste her, smell her and could still hear her soft moans that she made. This is why I didn't want things to happen in the first place because I knew I would become addicted to her.

I went to bed missing her.

When I got to college I met my room-mate straight away, he had arrived early and had already settled into his side of the room. Carlos seemed like a cool guy, maybe a little bit of a player but I knew that I would get on with him. It was a bonus that he was on the football team as well.

It was good to meet new people, new girls it took my mind off her for a while but as I lay in bed at night alone I thought of her. She was always my last thought before I fell asleep. I wondered constantly if she had met someone, if she was dating, if she remembered me but I knew I had messed everything up by sleeping with her. Sex really does ruin friendship.

I hadn't met anyone since her.