Broken - A pretty face doesn't cover an ugly heart

39

(Anna's POV)

I no longer want to feel this way. It's been a long week, and Evan just won't reply my messages. I know his always around because of Barbra, but he doesn't come here anymore, I just listen when she's on the phone with him. I feel such a stalker. And dumb. So stupid. If I had never said anything, we would still be friends, at least. Now, the only thing I did was give to that psycho girlfriend of him another reason to not want me around.

Haley thinks I'm wrong. That even that things didn't went the way I wanted, it was a worth experience. Otherwise I would be forever wondering "what if"...

But I don't know if I can be so positive about it. I feel my heart heavier on my chest every day, and I miss talking to him. I know I need to respect his space, but why can't I have a break from these feelings? I'm so tired.

I've been such a mess lately. I don't know, maybe this is my karma about Daniel and James. My eyes are full of tears and I've found very hard to breathe easily. I can't fight with this sensation, I'm just so regretted of things that I never did. The worst part about this, is that I don't even know if it would have made a difference. I cannot keep crying for things I can't change. But how do I make my heart understand it?

***

(Barbra's POV)

I almost got late to work. What was I thinking? I'll never set the alarm to 5 more minutes again.

I'm checking my messages, and I can't stop thinking about Evan's need of advice about Anna. I'm afraid he's not fully convinced that she isn't an option. God, can't Vanessa do anything without knowing this? I don't want to tell her, because I know eventually she would question Evan about it, and he would never forgive me.

While I'm stuck on traffic, my head is leaning on the bus window, and I notice a bride's dresses store. Suddenly, the picture of me on a white and shinning wedding dress pops into my mind and I think it's a very attractive thought.

But I need to wait at least one more year before I introduce that idea to Ryan. That's it. I'll set an alarm to this very own day on next year to bring the subject. It will be great to my future. I mean, is basically join the useful to the pleasant side, right? I love Ryan, and I love the fact that we would be great as a married couple.

Now, because of his dad's death, he's rich, which isn't why I want to marry him. But as a future architect, it will be great to have such a big company to support my projects, and also, which such a great connection it will be much easier to make a name.

I'm feeling very lucky. I know I can do it by myself; I'm fully capable of it. But if I could use Ryan's company to help me, it will take half of the time.

And last but not least... He doesn't like confrontation very much. And being a married guy is a very easy way to get him out of Anna's hands.

I finally arrived. Just in time... how lucky. Oh, God... I feel like I'm finally having everything that I deserve. It feels so right. I'm not letting anyone take this away from me this time.

***

- Thanks for coming.

- No problem man. How are you feeling?

Ryan took a second before he answered.

- Not great. I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm under a lot of pressure right now. The council members think I'm too young; they all want to see me ruin it.

- Don't give them the chance. They're a bunch of old and arrogant men, you'll find a way to get their trust.

Ryan didn't seem so optimistic.