Remember for me

Chapter thirty

"Naming babies is serious business" Derek laughs as the kids make fun of all the effort that went into naming the baby.

"Just pick a pretty name and go with it" Bailey said.

"It isn't that easy" Lexie protested "if you give the kid a retarded name, it's stuck with that name forever"

"I heard someone named their kid Nutella" Zola laughed.

"I'd go with something like that" Bailey nodded in approval.

"I like Riley" Ellie says randomly.

Meredith laughs at her children, trying to ignore the pain in her chest that came every time she thought about what it would be like to forget them.

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Meredith's POV:

Twenty four weeks in, and I was still feeling awful. Everything was swelled up, nothing fit me, and I was so moody and emotional I cried at the dumbest things.

"I'm gonna go a little early tonight" I tell Bailey "my shift ends in ten minutes anyway"

Bailey nodded, not really caring if I left or not. "Be in on time for rounds tomorrow morning Grey. Growing a baby doesn't give you special privileges. Women do it every day you aren't the first"

All I did was sigh and walk over to the elevator. I was rubbing my stomach, trying to get the baby to calm down. He was definitely going to be a master in karate, that's for sure.

I got in the elevator the same time as Derek, who was surprisingly with some girl. A red head, who was more than likely a scrub nurse.

"Hi" I said politely. They both said their hellos and continued to talk. Apparently, he was taking her out on a date.

"I was thinking you could come over after" the scrub nurse, who's name I'd learned was
Rose, suggested.

Apparently the baby didn't like that comment, because I received a kick so hard to my ribs my eyes watered. "Ouch, stop kicking me!" I said aloud, accidentally.

Derek turned to face me, as I blushed in embarrassment "are you okay?" He asked.

No, I wasn't okay. I was mad that he was with the nurse, I was mad that I was fat, I was mad that I loved Derek so much, I was mad that I didn't love Mark as much as I should've and I was mad that my baby was kicking my freaking body black and blue.

"I'm okay" I said instead, trying to keep my voice steady. One more word from anyone and I was gonna crack.

"Are you sure?" His eyes were soft, and his voice was caring. That was all I needed to completely break down in sobs.

"No, I'm not okay! I'm fat, I'm sick, and Marks baby is kicking my ribs in! He's impregnanted me with a freaking boxing kangaroo" I sobbed. The nurse went to one side of me, gently rubbing my back, as Derek went to the other.

"But you'll have such a beautiful baby in just a few months" Derek said softly "and you're getting married"

"You think I want to get married? And be pregnant?" I snapped "I wanted to be a doctor first, a mother and a wife after that" I laughed lowly and sourly "Jesus my mother would throw a fit if she knew about this! Not like she can remember much of anything these days!"

"Is your Mother okay?" Derek asked.

"She's dying of freaking Alzheimer's!? I yell "she's about as okay as I am!"

Derek looks shocked, and so does the nurse. They both think I'm crazy, batshit, nut bae crazy.

"I'm sorry" I say, wiping my tears "I'm just very emotional" and so in love with you I want to cry and scream at the same time, I silently add.

"It's okay" Derek says softly "we all have our off days"

"Even the best of us have our off days" I sigh "but still, we move forward"

Derek nods and smiles, as the elevator comes to a stop "you'll be okay Mer, I know you will be. You're strong and you're determined. You'll be just fine, and in a short bit you'll have a gorgeous little baby to love"

"My son" I smile, thinking of the little man inside of me.

Derek smiles a somewhat sad, somewhat happy smile. Like he's sad for himself and happy for me almost. "Exactly. You'll have your son, your gorgeous little son"

With that, he left with Rose. Leaving me alone in the elevator. And as I watched the, walk away, I suddenly had a change in heart.

Thinking of Derek's words, I thought of how true they were. I didn't need him, sure I loved him but I didn't need him. I was going to have a cute, gorgeous little baby to love and cuddle and kiss.

Besides, every woman's first true love is her son.

A/n- agh! Only a few more chapters leftttttttt!! So sad :( Imma miss this book. But I'm excited for the Crowen fic :)

So something HUGE happens in the next chapter and something entirely different that's also HUGE happens after that. Just sayin, it's gonna be interesting from here on in.

Vote if you love the book, comment if you want the first chapter of the Crowen fic posted before I end this boookkkkk!!!

Love y'all thanks for reading!!!

~Daisy