It's really shitty because I was doing really well all day.
I had never felt so mentally or emotionally healthy.
But then I was left alone.
And now it's really, really quiet.
And it's a Saturday and everyone is out doing things,
And I'm at home, wrapped in sheets suffocating on ideas my mind whispers to me.
And all day all I could think was "wow, everything is so good"
But now all I can think is that
She hates me,
And he never cared,
And I'm never going to do anything,
And I'm always going to be like this.
And I hate it.
I hate how I finally have the hopes of going to bed with sweet dreams,
And everything flips and suddenly my nightmares aren't only when I'm sleeping.
And I hate it because when I wake up tomorrow, I probably won't be able to explain this feeling.
I'll probably regret the things I've said.
But right now I don't give a shit because it's all too much and I feel too much and I just want it all to stop.
