This Chapter chapter is kind of heavy..
Again, sorry for the delay.
And this new like... Center, not center text style is weird to me... But eh.
Enjoy!
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Sadie was sitting in her room, trying to calm herself down. But it wasn't working. People were banging at her door, screaming her name and pleas to be let in. She just kept whispering to herself, slightly believing they could hear her..
"I'm fine..I'm fine.." She kept whispering the lie to herself, as tears rolled down her cheeks and fell onto her blood soaked hands. Being a creepypasta was easy.. But being a creepypasta that has an addiction to cutting and the burning passion to kill herself every three minutes wasn't as easy as it seemed. She was screaming on the inside. Her pupil shrunk in fear as her subconscious screamed louder at her. It was just a long, held out shriek. Internal, though. No one else could hear it. Frankly she knew no one else could bear it. This scream goes on for days at a time. Then stops. Then the echoing silence that bounces around her head kills her mentally. You get enough silence to make someone go insane, a hell bearing internal scream, and boom. You get a whole bucket of suicide.
"I'm fine. I'm fine. F--...fine." Sadie's words were trailing off. The loud bangs on the door seemed to have been blocked out by her just talking to herself. And this event went on..for hours.
x (←new time skip)
"Sadie! Please open the door!" Jane was screaming. They were pleading at her. Saying things like:
"Sadie! Open the door!"
"Open it!"
"How long she's been in there?"
"This is the most serious she's gotten about this.."
"Someone get Jeff!"
"Sadie! Don't do anything, ok?"
"Open the door, please!"
"Sadie, baby, please open the door!"
The last phrase must have been from kagekao. She loved him. Like crazy. And her phrase soon changed.
"I'm...kagekao..kage--...fine." Her words were like a train off tracks. They had no rhythm. She had been slicing up her wrist for hours now. There was so much blood on her she wondered how she was still alive.
Then she stood up.
"Kagekao..I'm...kagekao..I'm fine...fine...kage--...fine." She walked over to the door and hesitated. She hated herself. She was making her friends, and her boyfriend, worry about her mercilessly. She touched the doorknob, the cold metal giving her goosebumps that traveled through her open wounds and up to her ears. She leaned against the door.
"I'm...fine....kagekao...I'm...sorry...I'm sorry...I'm sorry..!!" Sadie practically screamed.
"Sadie?" Kagekao called out. Sadie let tears fall down her cheeks, but didn't know why she was crying. At the moment, she felt empty. She wanted to feel whole..
And she knew how..
"I'm sorry, kagekao."
"Sadie? Wh-why are you sorry?...Sadie?"
The closet was heard opening.
"Sadie? Baby, answer me."
A chair was heard moving.
"Sadie?! Honey, no, please, stop!"
Sadie was heard stepping onto the chair.
"Sadie!! Oh god, Sadie!! Stop!!"
The rope was heard being tied.
"Jeff!! Do something!"
Sadie was heard, crying.
"Move, move, I'm kicking the door down."
Sadie was heard giving out a choked, strangled cry of pain.
"Fuck!! Jeff, hurry!"
With that, the door was kicked down. Kagekao swiftly jumped up and cut the rope with his knife, Sadie landing in his arms. She stared blankly, no emotion on her face. Everyone was screaming and crying and telling her it was ok. But she wasn't listening. All she cared about was being whole. And for a second, while her body was dangling, she felt whole.
But, apparently her definition of whole is a lot different from everyone else's.
x
"Its ok Sadie, take your time." Liu cooed. It was him, her, Jane, and kagekao at the table in the kitchen.
"I'm...sorry, everyone. I..I didn't mean to scare you all like that." Sadie's words were slow, as if she'd seen something traumatic.
"We understand, Sadie." Jane answered, "Its just the type of creepypasta you are."
"I...I know but..I don't want to be this way anymore. Its too hard." Sadie sighed.
"So you think killing yourself is going to change that? Hell, if anything that'll make things worse." Jeff snapped.
"Jeff!" Liu pushed.
"What?! I'm just telling her the truth! It may not be what she wants to hear but its the truth. Sadie, would you rather put up with actually being alive or would you rather sit in one spot and be set on fire for the rest of your life?"
"I..." Sadie started, but Jeff stopped her.
"That's just how it is, Sadie. You need to decide if living is better than going to hell. Cause' I'm pretty sure we're all going. We kill people for fun, cmon. That's got hell written all over it."
Jeff stood up and walked to the entrance of the kitchen.
"Sadie," he started, "when you make that decision let me know. And if your choice is actually dying and going to hell then I won't stop you the next time you try to commit suicide."
And he walked off. Jane and Liu didn't say anything and Sadie stared in his place as if he was still standing there.And she started thinking. Which did she prefer? She'd never been on fire, and her pain tolerance was pretty high so she didn't know how much it would take to actually hurt. But to sit in one place and test that for an eternity? She didn't know if she wanted that.
I mean maybe the internal scream and suicidal thoughts were enough to put up with...I mean who knows when she'll die. Not even her. She doesn't ever feel herself getting older, even though she's 20 years old now (made up age). She always feels the same. And change was different; it was scary.
She doesn't like different things that are scary...
