Random Rambles - Poems

#30

'DA'

It haunts you like a ghost

At 3AM, at 10PM, at 6AM

Unsuspectingly your body it hosts

You become lagged and unproductive, like an overloaded RAM

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Your irrationality makes you say "I'm fine."

Your mind becomes louder than your voice

Your common sense instantly goes offline

Your eyes become glassy like arctic ice

-

These DAs are plainly stupid occurrences

Yet they are able to drive you crazy

At this point Dota games are merely distractions

So you don't fall into its dark abyss

-

It stays in you for days and weeks

Having no idea when it will leave

But the DAs leave you even more weak

Because to your heart it only makes stronger weaves

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I don't know how to prepare myself

Before the next attack strikes

They leave me crying at the end of every battle

Because I lose pieces of myself from time to time

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How did such a strong girl fall into its hands?

I ask myself constantly

How did a girl who used to never care what people thought,

Now belittle every flaw and good thing about herself?

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I don't know when I'll be able to find myself again

I can only cling to mere distractions

And kind interaction and friendly diversions

Let's just hope I come out alive and DA-less

-

This battle isn't one where it could be quickly ended

Even with the simple wave of a white flag

No surrendering

Just you.. And yourself

-

I break myself, people fix me;

People fix me, I break myself

This never-ending cycle

Leaves me more shattered after every lap

-

It comes again

I need to go

-----

How many nights does it take to count the stars?

That's the time it would take to fix my heart

Oh, baby, I was there for you

All I ever wanted was the truth, yeah, yeah  

How many nights have you wished someone would stay?

Lie awake only hoping they're okay

I never counted all of mine

If I tried, I know it would feel like infinity

- 'Infinity', One Direction