In The Blowing Ashes

Chapter 24

Katniss

I sit in the living room, Shadow purring on my lap while Peeta sketches in his book. Just a quiet morning, the two of us enjoying each other's company. I know we won't get many more of these days. Not after our daughter is born. Even now, she seems to think she needs to remind me she's there, kicking at Shadow making him give my big belly a strange look as he bats back softly. Eventually I just push him off and stand up. He lets out an annoyed meow and I just shrug my shoulders.

"I know you didn't start it, but until she isn't sitting in there, I get stuck in the middle of of your little fights. And I really don't like getting hit from both sides," I say making Peeta laugh. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. We look at each other, both of us puzzled.

"Were we expecting visitors?" He asks and I shake my head.

"Not that I knew of," I say and he gets up and goes to answer the door. I follow him, a little slower than I could have without being half way through my pregnancy. When he opens the door, I find myself smiling as I see the woman in front of us. "Annie?" She laughs and opens her arms. I wrap my arms around her, pulling her as close as possible with my pregnant belly. She pulls away laughing and rubs my arms.

"Look at you," she says. "You are absolutely glowing." I smile and lay my hands on my swollen baby belly.

"Yeah," I say. "Being four months pregnant will do that to a girl." I hear a chuckle behind her and look over to see a boy about fourteen or fifteen years old with sandy red hair and piercing green eyes. "Oh my gosh! Annie don't tell me this is little Finn!" He laughs again.

"Hi Aunt Kitty," he says and I pull him into a hug. "Guess I've done some growing, huh." I pull away from him and smile.

"Maybe on the outside," I say. "But to me you're still that little boy who snuck into my room before my wedding to protect me from my nightmares." He gives me the crooked grin he inherited from his father and I kiss his cheek. "It's nice to see you both."

"What about me?" A voice I haven't heard in nearly fifteen years asks and I turn my head to see her sitting there on my porch swing. "What welcome do I get, Katniss?"

"Mother? You came with them?" She nods, standing up very slowly.

"I know it's been hard, with me leaving," she says. "But I thought that maybe I'd finally check to see how you and my grand baby are doing."

"I know why you couldn't be here," I say. "But I thought you'd at least have come to our wedding." Peeta gives me an awkward glance and I feel his hand on my arm.

"Katniss," he says in a soft, warning tone. I look at him, Annie, and Finnick.

"I need five minutes alone with her," I say and Peeta nods, going back into the house, Annie and Finnick following behind him. The door shuts behind him and she finally answers my question.

"I'm sorry I couldn't have been there on your wedding day," she says. "But I still, I couldn't come back here. Not with so many memories. The pain was still so raw. I could barely stand the hour I was here when you dislocated your knee. I knew I didn't have to worry about you. I knew Peeta would take care if you far better than I ever could. I knew you were happy and that all your father and I ever wanted for you." At the mention of my father, I feel tears in my eyes and I quickly wipe them away.

"Are you here to stay or are you just visiting?" I ask her.

"I have a life in Four now," she says. "And I don't know that I could give that up. But that being said, I do want to be part of your lives. So if you'll allow me, maybe I could stay a week or so and help you two with the baby after he or she is born and maybe every month or so, I could stay a weekend so I can be part of that baby's life." My daughter kicks in response and I look down at my belly.

"I think she'd like having her grandmother in her life," I say. "Other than Peeta and I, you're her only blood relative. Annie and Finnick and Haymitch and Delly, they'll be her family, but she'll need you too."

"She?" my mother asks and I nod.

"It's a girl," I say. "We found out about two weeks ago." She reaches out and touches my cheek and how close she is to me makes me notice how frail she's become over fifteen years.

"You grew up into such a beautiful young woman," she says. "Your father would have loved to see you so happy. Even though you always told him that you weren't going to marry or have kids, he'd always hope you'd change your mind. He wanted to see you with this glow on your face and that light in your eyes. And most of all, he wanted to see you raise a beautiful little girl of your own." I feel myself start crying and she pulls me into a hug and she kisses my cheek.

"I'm so happy you're here now," I say. "I'm so scared of having this baby, that I won't be good enough for her, or that something will happen when I give birth." She just holds me, rubbing my back and stroking my hair like when I was three, before she had Prim, when I would get scared or hurt and my father wasn't there to sing to me.

"Oh Katniss," she says. "You're becoming a mother. Those fears are as natural as your heart beating and those little kicks she gives you. I felt it with you and I felt it with your sister. It doesn't matter if its your first or your fifth child. A little bit of you is gonna be terrified until you hold that little girl in your arms."

"I've missed you, Mother," I say.

"I've missed you too Sweetie," she says. "I've missed you too."