Seduced ➢ Kylo Ren

thirteen; just admit it

You're both sitting on his bed, encased in the darkness of Kylo's room. Neither of you have said anything for a while, just sitting in silence. It's not an uncomfortable silence, though. You know it's not easy for Kylo to appear so vulnerable, know it's not easy for him to open up. So you're giving him his time.

He's sitting at the end of the bed, his head in his hands, elbows resting on his knees. You're sitting cross-legged behind him, absentmindedly using the Force to play around with a pillow, lifting it up to the ceiling and slowly bringing it back down.

After a while, the silence starts feeling overwhelming. And then you realise that he will never talk to you, not out of his own accord. Not unless you give him a little push, make him see that you would never judge him. Help him realise you don't see him as being weak for finally acknowledging his emotions.

You slide up next to him, your feet dangling off the bed. He doesn't move. You play with your hands in your lap for a few seconds before whispering, "Kylo? Do you wanna talk?"

He removes his head from his hands, sniffs and furiously wipes away tears from his cheeks with his hands. He keeps on staring in front of him, into the darkness.

"Don't call me Kylo anymore."

He waits a few seconds before mumbling, "Ben."

His voice is broken, uncharacteristically hushed. It surprises you. You had never seen him act so... human.

You don't know what to say to him. You feel an overwhelming urge to wrap your arms around him, soothe him, let him know it's okay. It's what you would have done in any other situation.

But you don't. You keep your hands to yourself, even though you can see him start to shake. Just because he's let you in on what his previous name was, doesn't really mean anything. It doesn't mean he's about to let you in on more secrets, or that he's going to break down all the walls he's built around himself in the past years.

It also means you shouldn't yet let your guard down. Something you have to repeat to yourself over and over again. Seeing him this vulnerable is leading you to believe that he can be fixed. That you can fix him, save him. But you know that may not be the case.

He could be too far gone.

"Why did you stop calling yourself Ben?" You start with what you think is an easy question.

He turns to face you, but doesn't look in your eyes. "Ben was never cut out for the Dark Side. He never would have accomplished what I have. He was weak."

You stay silent, allow him space to continue. Vent if he needs to.

"Kylo Ren is respected, feared." He feel his voice waver, and he stops there. A tear rolls onto his cheek, and he angrily wipes it away, and adds, his voice breaking, "I must seem so pathetic."

"You're not pathetic," you say, and, in a desperate attempt to stop him from crying, wrap your arms around his bare torso, your cheek resting against his shivering chest. Without thinking, you say, "I don't care what you call yourself- Ben or Kylo- please don't fight me off. You need a friend."

Surprisingly enough, he lets you hug him. You can feel his heart race. He doesn't drape his arms around you, instead he awkwardly keeps them to his side. For a brief second, he considers apologising for all the times he was mean to you.

But he's too proud to actually do it.

After a while, you pull back and ask him to look at you. "I want you to know that you don't have to act like Kylo Ren when it's just us. You can trust me."