Seduced ➢ Kylo Ren

thirty-eight; uncontrollable

"You will land this ship immediately." 

Rage is starting to burn red hot in your veins, but your face remains calm. You're surprised at how you're managing to keep a lid on the anger bubbling inside of you; it's almost as if your pulse is going so fast it's no longer pulsing- it's beating so fast it's no longer beating- it's dissolved into a hum.

"Don't- what are you doing?" Kylo sighs heavily, snatching your hand away from the stormtrooper-pilot's head, pushing it into your side. "Stop mind-controlling them."

"I need to find my mother, Ben. You're out of your mind if you think that-" you jerk your hand away from his and place it on the stormtrooper's head again, "-I'm not going try my damned hardest to find her."

"Land this ship NOW." You can feel the stormtroopers' auras, vibrating calmly in the air; you manipulate their thoughts, force your will to overpower theirs.

You don't even care that this is wrong. You're finally out of that godforsaken Finalizer- nothing mattered now except finding her.

"You're being irrational, we don't even know where she is-"

"I don't care. I do not care."

"We don't know if she's alive, Luna"

Your hand lifts itself so lightning-fast you don't even realise it's suspended in the air just above Kylo's face. He flinches- for half a second- expecting you to slap him across the face. 

And you would have.

You really wanted to, right then.

But you had controlled yourself. 

"Don't you ever say that again. I have nothing. Nothing. I need to find her or I'll die trying."

Kylo furrows his brows and takes a step back, confusion and hurt shadowing his face. "You have nothing?" It's difficult to speak with the lump that has suddenly formed in his throat.

The hurt he feels; the pain spreading across his heart becomes blinding for a few seconds, he loses control of his thoughts, lets the walls around his mind fall. 

How can you say that you have nothing? 

Has all the aching and the fighting and the crying and the loving not been enough to prove to you that you have him?

It happens in the few seconds he forgets to guard his mind- you're still on high-alert, your brain going crazy trying to control the Force radiating off the two stromtrooper who are piloting the ship under your control- when you hear loud thoughts, the kind of thoughts which you have now grown accustomed to.

Heavy, loud, thoughts, tinged with a certain signature darkness.

She's on Jakku.

Jakku.

Your mother's on Jakku.

Jakku.

I can't tell her. 

Jakku.

I won't.

You feel yourself start to the shake uncontrollably, from the bottom of your core straight up to your jaw, your teeth rattling, as you slowly turn to face Kylo, your eyes wide in a crazy, almost-murderous glare. 

"YOU KNEW?" 

The hurt on his face is quickly replaced by a facade of nonchalance; though you know- you can feel it brimming underneath- it's masking panicking.

"YOU KNEW? YOU KNEW? YOU KNEW! YOU KNEW?!" The voice is escaping your lungs through no control of your own; you feel yourself going mad with rage, throwing yourself at Kylo, slamming your palms into his chest. Your mind feels like it's lost control, it's finally broken, after all this time.

This is the tipping point.

You're hearing yourself screeching the same question over and over again, until, slowly, your throat starts to go numb, until your voice-box cannot produce another sound.

You're not even aware of the fact that no sound is escaping your chest; you keep mouthing the question, hitting his chest, tears now rolling down your cheeks.

He doesn't even try to stop you. No protests, no retaliation, no calm, manipulative words. 

Nothing.

You can't even see him anymore; your vision is blurred and the tears refuse to stop coming. 

The cries subside into loud sobbing, and you feel like you have control over your senses again, as you whimper against his chest, one arm weakly attempting to punch him.

"How- how-" you have completely lost your voice. "How long have you known?" You feel your bottom lip quivering, your eyes swelling.

"Since I met you."

It would mean the world to me if you could check out my original story: The Midnight Dilemma - undercover agent, bad boy gang leader, cartel adventures, secrets, tension, enemies to lovers, etc. It's a WIP and I'd love any feedback you might have. Thank you sososoososooo much 🥺