As some of you know, I'm Korean, but also a Canadian citizen. Recently when people on Wattpad ask me 'where are you from?' I don't know what to say anymore. I moved here when I was in the third grade, and English obviously replaced Korean as my first language. So I'm still fluent in Korean, but often there are times where I'm speaking it and then suddenly I stop and I'm stumped because I don't know how to phrase something, or pronounce something, and it's those little things that make me sad. Plus, I haven't been to Korea in years, and now it feels like a different world to me. Every day I lose a part of the language and a part of the culture, and maybe eventually I'll lose it all together. It sounds stupid, but I don't know what I even am anymore.
See it's gotten worse now that I'm obsessed with Kpop/Kdramas, because I always see comments from Western fans asking someone to translate a celebrity's video or tweet, or trying obsessively to indulge in Korean culture. And then I want to tell them proudly: "I'm Korean, guys. I'll translate it for you." But am I really? Wouldn't Koreans back in my country see me as a Western fan, too? Am I Korean or Canadian or both or neither?
And I'm guessing a lot of multi-cultured people might feel the same, (I'm guessing mostly immigrants) maybe even that one side is stronger than the other. TBH I don't think anyone would understand that unless they were going through it, too. How do you guys deal with it? Let me know.
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Bottled up | thoughts
عشوائيIn which I complain about everything and try(fail) really hard to be inspirational
