Keep Quiet // Josh Dun (completed)

chapter five :: pasts and unpacking

HOLY THANKS FOR 1K

The weekend was extra long.

Not just because there was no school on Monday, but because Nicole and Josh couldn't stop thinking about each other.

Nicole kept thinking about little things about Josh that she loved like the little duck tails on the back of his head. She just wanted to wrap them around her finger. And how at lunch when she listened to her music, Josh would try to subtly lean closer to her to hear what she was listening to. She just wanted to give him an earbud and lean right back into his shoulder.

Josh kept thinking about how nice her hand felt. In a non creepy way. It was soft and small. It was also cold but Josh felt his warmed hers up. He liked how her smile was soft and her laugh could light up anybody's day. But he would give anything to hear her speak.

On Sunday, Nicole decided it would be the perfect day to do what she usually did every weekend. But she had to skip last week since she was sick. But this day was extra important.

She got her dad to drive her, seeing as she would be too teary eyed to drive.

"You sure you wanna walk out alone? I know you usually do, but this time it's different." Nicole's dad asked.

"I'm positive." Nicole said. She stepped out of the car with her flowers and hand written letter and walked through the grass until she got to where she wanted to be.

Her mothers tomb stone.

"Hey mommy..." She sighed. 

She just stared for a minute and bit her lip.

"Sorry I couldn't come last weekend. I got sick" People must've thought she was crazy because she always talked when she came here. "I met someone. He's really sweet a-and just pretty much amazing" the early November wind whipped her hair around. "You would like him. He has colored hair a this cool tattoo on his arm" she said. "And uh... I haven't spoke to him yet. Not a single word in a month" She gulped. "I was always a little shy but when you left it just... Got out of hand and I just stopped." She bit her lip. "And I miss you so much. Two years is a long time without you" she looked down and let out a sob. She just stood for a few minutes and cried. She couldn't do anything else. Her dad couldn't hug her. Nicole looked at stone and read the epitaph to herself.

A loving wife, mother, and daughter.

The date of death was the same date printed on her wrist.

Nicole's parents had no problems. They didn't fight very much or hate each other. She got lucky. But her mom had problems of her own. Her dad tried to help her fix them but it didn't work and... yeah.

"So just..." Nicole put the flowers against the stone and the letter between the rubber band that bonded the flowers together so it wouldn't fly away. "I-I'll see you next weekend okay?" She kissed her hand and put it up to the picture that was printed onto the stone.

She walked back to the car and wiped her eyes.

"You okay?" Her dad asked.

"Yeah I'll be fine" She said quietly and nodded.

When she woke up the next day, she looked around her room. It's been a month and she still hasn't fully unpacked. She really only had clothes, hygiene necessities, and her music.

So she got an idea.

Nicole 💕: hey you should come over

Taco Cat King 👑: for why

Nicole 💕: for why are you talking like that

Taco Cat King 👑: what time do you want me over

Nicole 💕: whenever

Nicole's dad wasn't going to be home so she wasn't going to tell him. He was at work. In Chicago, he was the Midwest national parks director. He oversaw the whole department but they wanted to move him to a more smaller area to see how he could help so that's why they moved to Columbus. Whether he liked the job or not determined if they stayed there or not. But it was Monday so he wasn't home and school was out so why not?

Nicole got dressed and waiting for Josh. He arrived about an hour later and Nicole led him up to her room.

"Why are we in your bedroom again?" Josh asked.

Nicole opened her arms and gestured to all the boxes spread in different parts of her room.

"So I'm helping you unpack?" He asked.

Nicole smiled and nodded.

"Okay" He said. Nicole turned her speakers on and fall out boy was the first to play. She sat on the floor and pulled a box in front of her. Josh sat on the other side and they opened it and started pulling stuff out.

This box held certain trinkets and little toys that she had when she was younger.

Josh pulled out a small plush octopus toy that had a rattling sound to it.

"Hey Nic" he got her attention and held it next to his face and started shaking it. "My name is Nicole and I have stuffed toys even though I'm a senior in high school" Josh mocked.

Nicole laughed and snatched it from him, holding it to her chest.

"It's hard to mock you when I have no idea what your voice sounds like" Josh said. He wanted so badly to just hear what she had to say and how she said it.

The next box held pictures and such.

Nicole started arranging some of the picture frames on her dresser and hung some up on the wall.

Josh pulled out the last picture from the box and examined it. It was bigger than the rest. He read the back: Nicole and Jennifer, 2002.

"Hey is this you and your mom?" He held the picture up for Nicole. Her smile faded when she saw it.

She slowly nodded and took it, setting it on her bedside table.

Nicole was only eight in the photo and Josh thought she looked adorable.

"Sorry if uh... That made you upset or anything"

Nicole shook her head and continued unpacking.

"Hey..." Josh put his hands on her shoulders from behind her. She turned around and looked up at Josh, but particularly his lips.

Josh pulled her into a hug and rested his chin on top of her head.

"Like I said, sorry"

But it was totally okay to Nicole. Josh didn't know. He didn't know that her mom died. He didn't know that it was only two years ago. He didn't know so she was okay with it.

Nicole played with the hem on the bottom of Josh's jacket while Josh rubbed his hand up and down her back.

Josh placed a quick kiss on top of her forehead before pulling away.

"You okay?" He asked, his hands on her shoulders.

Nicole smiled and nodded.

She always felt okay with Josh.