Between a Rock and a Hard Place // c.h.

42 - Reunion

8 1/2 months later

   'Jesus, it's hot.' I thought, lifting a soft, wool blanket from my lap. My T.V. blared at full volume, a commercial advertising some sort of product that might have been important to some sort of people. I looked around my apartment, which I'd gotten after a week of Luke being gone from California. I'd used my college account to rent the apartment for a year, and I was slowly adjusting to life alone. My hand rested on my bulging stomach, feeling for any hints of the baby I carried. The baby I'd been carrying for almost nine months. I was almost full term, and I hadn't spoken to Luke or Calum since they'd left. For some reason, the thought didn't concern me as much as it had in the beginning. I hadn't spoken to many people, other than Abby or maybe Michael once in a while.

I looked at my stomach, which was exposed by the loose shirt I wore. Over time, the idea of having a baby had began to seem more appealing. I'd gotten a job as a manager at a small grocery store next to my apartment, and I'd put every penny I'd earned toward buying supplies for the baby. As much as I had hated the idea of a child at first, I was excited to see their face for the first time. The knowledge that there was someone who was half me and half of one of the people I loved inside me had stopped me from cutting, from starving. My self harm had gone away over time and my depression had become slightly more manageable. For that, I was extremely grateful. I couldn't even put it in words. My fingers traced over my skin, feeling for something, anything. Our of nowhere, my doorbell rang loudly, shocking me out of the trance I had found myself in. I stood slowly, with effort, and waddled to the door. I grabbed the handle, pulling it open.

   "Calum?" He stood on the doorway, a bouquet of flowers in his hand and a small smile etched on his face. His eyes were tired, but he still looked happy. His eyes... The eyes I'd missed so desperately. The eyes of a boy I loved. I threw myself at him, everything else in the world quickly disappearing into the background. His warm, welcoming arms held me strongly. For the first time in a while, I felt tears streaming from my eyes, down my cheeks, into Cal's chest. "I missed you so much." I spoke into his chest, breathing in his scent. God how I'd missed him. His presence made everything seem a million times better. My dim world felt brighter than the sun itself. The embrace lasted for a while, just me, the boy I loved, our heartbeats beating in time with each other's. We were made for each other. In that moment, nothing else mattered except Calum. He was perfect, and we were perfect together. "I love you." I told the brown-eyed boy, leaning back so I could see his eyes. I pressed my lips to his, tasting everything I'd missed so much. His kiss tasted like cinnamon and honey, warm and loving. I loved him more than words could describe, so I didn't speak, I just allowed the kiss to speak for me, the electricity transferring between us like magic. His comforting hand brushed across my cheek, cupping my face gently.

   "I love you so fucking much Cara." He spoke into the kiss, barely parting his lips from mine. After what seemed like hours of our lips together, he looked down, examining my new body. I blushed, embarrassed of my shape, of my bulging stomach that declared the unplanned pregnancy proudly. Cal bent to his knees, his hands sliding their way down my body, never leaving my skin. His ton was delicate and careful. Once they reached my stomach they stopped moving almost completely. His thumbs traced circles on my skin, slowly and full of care. "You're so beautiful." He whispered, I was unsure if he was speaking to me or to the baby I carried, but I didn't care. His warm lips planted a kiss on my stomach, then he pulled away softly, slowly standing back so that he was back to his normal height, his deep brown eyes meeting mine. "Me and Luke are ok." He promised me, holding my hands in his own. "He's here, at a hotel. If you want to see him." He admitted, clearly hoping I would choose to stay.

   "I want to see you." I breathed, leaning into him. Cal swept his arm underneath me, swiftly picking me up. He cradled me and walked to my bedroom, setting me carefully on the bed. He rested next to me, his arms wrapped around me and my head pressed firmly into his chest. I felt his every breath as if it were my own, and heard his strong heartbeat in my ear. Everything in the world felt right, then and there, with the boy I loved more than I had ever loved anyone. We spent the day lying together, talking and eventually drifting off.

   A sharp pain stabbed up my spine. I threw my head back, groaning. "Fuck..." I managed, attempting to draw in a breath. The simple action sent a whole new wave of daggers through my back, stinging and stabbing, knocking the air out of my lungs. I felt a hand on my shoulder, the only reality in my world of pain. If there ever was a hell, this was it. 'Cara...' Something in the distance echoed my name, trying to pull me out of the pain I was in. 'Cara please answer!' Calum. The sound, the voice, was Calum. Before I had time to process anything, another wave of pain washed over my body.

   Reality slipped away from me and before I knew it, everything in the ever-noisy world that I knew so well went utterly silent.