The Kick Back

Brighter Days...breaking the cycle

Living in my parent's empty home became the norm for me. Their old memories began to fade and there was no need to harbor old feelings. Everything that reminded of a broken home was thrown out, or packed away and put in the attic. The weekends were spent re-doing the house, hanging out by myself, or researching information. There was no more feeling sorry for myself, It was time to move on. Life became easier as school became my outlet. Joining after school activities was a priority. Everything was getting back on track. There were rumors of my parents talking about getting back together. That was the last thought I wanted to entertain. Finally I was focused on me and my future, with a slight distraction. Antonio was still in the back of my head. Even though we had broken up, I still loved him. It was hard to let our memories go. The laughs, tears, kisses, and smiles would always be with me. Sad part was he had moved on. Mike wasted no time in telling me about his new girl Maria. It hurt to hear how fast he moved on to the next, but as long as he was happy that was all that mattered.

The blacks and Hispanics were still at each others throats. They were not willing to set aside differences and come together. Being apart of that drama wasn't for me, I dared to be different. This would be the day that I broke the rules. School was one of three things a hang out spot, fashion show, or outlet. What I was about to do would change the game. Walking through the doors of Roosevelt Jr. High School felt different. I was looking good, feeling good, and made to keep the attention on me. I wasn't one to like attention, but the change had to come from somewhere.

I walked through doors with a pair of tight skinny jeans, a brand new pair of Jordan grape five's, an all white t-shirt, and matching earrings. My hair had been tapered and cut. it was a new day from this day forward. Walking through the hallways, heads turned, and every dude who had ever ignored me was now on me. My attention wasn't on them, but what I was about to do. Roosevelt Jr. High school had been divided by hallways. My heart began beating heavy as I turned down the his panic's hallway. I looked around to see a whole new world. It was amazing to see how they all stuck together. Almost like they were all family.

Walking down they hallway felt like a prison sentence, and I was walking to the electric chair. The looks, snares, and side comments were all worth the reaction that I was given. Smiling as I politely spoke to the girls who wanted to rip my head off, I walked in confidence. I noticed a familiar face as I headed towards the lunch room. "Hey Mike", I shouted. Turning Mike began smiling hard. "What's up Steph", his eyes were glued on me. We met halfway and greeted each other with a hug. "You lookin good girl..Damn." We both broke out in laughter.

The Hispanics all looked in confusion. Why was this black on there side of the building? why was one of their people interacting with one of 'us'? The attention of the people didn't stop of us from enjoying one another's company. It felt good to break the rules and from the looks on Mike face, the feelings were mutual. I grabbed Mikes arm as we walked to the lunch room. Caught in the moment I hadn't noticed that Antonio had been walking behind us.

A cold hand reached out and grabbed my shoulder. "You aren't going to speak?" was all I heard before my heart jumped out of my chest. I played it cool and remained civil. Even though he had hurt my feelings, I had no desire to act out. "Forgive me for being rude. How are you Antonio? Long time no hear." Smiling at him I continued my walk to the lunch room. Maybe I'll catch up with him another time. For right now I had a plan that would break down barriers.

Antonio I haven't forgot about you....