stupid fanfic moments

#3

cliche and unrealistic

when in a book the beginning is like

my name tia
me parents dead
have no mo parents no mo
me purrtyy
me luv starbucks
me so populur
evryun lush me su much

or

omg hey what are you doing here omg anyway my name is tia and oh look hot guy omg no tia control tia. control. anyway aha where was i omg yeah right. so im the most popular person ever and all da bois lush meh so mooch omgeee

like honestly it gives me a headache and its not even relatively funny so plz no thanks :)

or

I was walking to school and me get hit by bus. ouchy. dat hurt then me go into coma ME MUST WAKE UP AHHHH ILY BABY NOOO

or

I was driving down the road to go see my side hoe and this bitch ass car decided to run into me and kill me. nigga imma haunt you when imma ghost..

or

"WAKE UPPPPPPPPP HOE" my dad yelled as he ran in my room with an axe trying to cut my head off. man, he must be drunk again. as he swung the axe around my room, aiming at my face, I slowly got out of bed and gathered my clothes and walked into my bathroom to take a shower. minutes before I was near close to done, I heard an axe break through the bathroom door. UGH. DAD. NOT AGAIN. IM TRYING TO TAKE A SHOWER HERE. IM NOT DONE YET

THIS HAPPENED IN A BOOK ONCE NO LIE

but like really?

cone on guys

(yeah guys. cone on. gosh. get your cones on!1!1!1!)

COME ON GUYS**

MAKE IT REALISTIC AT LEAST

a/n this bitches name is tia now so ;)