My Letters to God.

Letter 79

Thank you Lord for this day You given us and also for this morning breakfast with my family. Thank You for giving me peace to sleep and Lord...thank you for all your wonderful blessings You give. Man...It's still a battle but Lord I still want to walk with You. It's hard but simple. I'm afraid but I want to continue and not just talk the talk but walk the walk and I want to do it leaning on You Jesus. Yahweh. I don't want to be afraid and keep letting the devil get a foothold. When I die, I don't really know what I want it to be for. You of course but...wow I am so clueless huh? I want to know it's You calling me home Lord. I want to not be afraid because it means I'm going home to You. I want to do good and keep going, even if it means crawling because You are what is right Lord. So Lord, please teach me how to align myself with You more and not myself. To kill off my selfishness and keep praising you even more in the storm of life and enemies. I haven't written in a while Lord but I started again yesterday. It's like that fear and emotions I went through, it just stopped me from writing and it just got to me. Today I was thinking and I forgot about what but it was about my writing. A friend said to write for the fun of it and I know she was helping and I thank her for it but Lord, I didn't want to write just anything because it wasn't about You. It reminded me of this one song (can't remember) and in the song the singer said that if his words don't lead people to You then he didn't want to talk at all. It just like me...if my songs don't have You in them then Lord I don't want to write at all. It wouldn't be fun and it wouldn't at all be in my heart to write...like praise dancing. Every time I think of dancing like today, automatically those words like "renounce God and you can dance" and then I be like "shut up!" and start rebuking it today because those aren't my thoughts! But today Lord I remembered that when we have a job, we do it like we're doing it for You-it praises You and dancing is something people praises you with. Not famous people (none that I can think of) but I've seen a lot of praise dances and even youth praise dancers dance for You in worship and it just brought me back to my writing. I want to worship you with my talents Jesus and that's my writing. If You are not in it then I don't want to write at all. I do NOT want to go against You so to the devil SHUT UP AND BACK THE FREAK UP! I am going to continue following You Yahweh. Lord. Jesus Christ Almighty! Lord Jesus, Thank You. 

Amen.