Something Worth Living For

Chapter 25. Identity Crisis

Today was the day that I would finally get to meet some family members that I might actually like. I just hope and pray that they are nothin like my family back in the city. I would love to get a break from my life, and all the drama I got goin on wit this love shit. Sometimes I wish I wouldve just stayed a cold hearted bitch instead of lettin anybody get close to me. This shit is startin to get so complicated and I just don't know if it's worth it anymore. I love Tae, but I love Quan too and I dont wanna hurt either of them. Quan has been tryna talk to me, but to avoid temptation i've become very distant with him. I mean why would I add insult to injury by being around someone I know is in love wit me, but cant have me. I made a promise to my self that I wont cheat on Tae wit Quan, and the best way to keep my promise is to keep my distance from Quan. Im new to this whole love thing and I be damned if im the reason people hearts get broken. Honestly I wanted to talk to somebody about what I was goin through, but I couldnt talk to L or Lora. Maybe I should talk to Reggie about it, but then again I dont really know about him either. What the fuck u never know until u try...Right?

Yatta: Reggie...
Reggie: Wussup lil cuz?(he said still drivin)
Yatta: Can I talk to u about somethin, and It just stay between me and u?
Reggie: Is it about Tae?
Yatta: Well...In a way.
Reggie: Um I dont know Yatta. Lora got a way of gettin shit out of me.
Yatta: I can just imagine because I do the same thing to Quan...I mean Tae.(i said realizin I said the wrong name)
Reggie: Who is Quan? U aint talkin about ole dude on the team wit Tae are u?
Yatta: Yea...
Reggie: U cheatin on Tae!?(he said lookin at me as if he would beat my ass)
Yatta: NO!! I couldnt do that to him I love him too much to do some foul shit like that.
Reggie: So what was that about just now?
Yatta: U prolly didnt know, but me and Quan go back to middle school. He's always been like a big brother to me, and one of my only friends. The thing is he just recently told me that he was IN LOVE wit me, and honestly I love him too. Im not in love wit him though im in love wit Tae, but I cant deny that I dont feel somethin for him. I just dont know what to do about this whole situation though because I dont wanna lose him, but I feel like I'll lose him anyway sooner or later since im wit Tae.
Reggie: That nigga gay!?(he said shocked)
Yatta: Reggie is that really the only fuckin thing u heard me say!?(i asked irritated)
Reggie: My bad that just caught me off gaurd. I mean do his friendship really mean that much to u, and if so is it worth risking yo relationship wit Tae? What do u think would happen if one day yall get some time alone, and one awkward moment turn into a kiss then progress from there.
Yatta: I know thats why I been keepin my distance from him lately because I dont know if I would be able to resist the temptation.
Reggie: I dont think u should avoid him, but instead talk to him and let him know wussup. If he cant keep his feelings in check, and respect yo relationship then maybe yall need to chill out for a while.
Yatta: He never said that he was gone try to sabotage my relationship, but knowin he actually feels that way about me makes it harder to be around him.
Reggie: Well if he really is yo friend and loves u like he says he does hell respect yo feelings about the situation.
Yatta: I hope its really that easy.(i sighed)

Finally we pulled up to his mama house, and I slowly got out not really knowin what to expect. He walked up to the door without a care in the world until he realized I was fallin behind.

Reggie: Yatta come on u aint got no reason to be nervous.
Yatta: Yea yea dont rush me.
Reggie: Man bring yo ass on!

He grabbed my hand basically draggin me to the door before unlockin it. As we walked in he called for his mom and she responded from somewhere in the house. I looked around at all the pictures on the wall of all the people that were potentially my family. When she finally appeared from what looked like the kitchen wipin her hands she froze when she saw me.

Regina: Oh Reggie I didnt know u were bringin company baby.
Reggie: Nah ma this aint company. This is Kenyatta uncle Mark son.
Regina: What u talkin about.(she asked confused)
Reggie: Remember the dude I was tellin u about said uncle Mark was his dad? Well this is him.