He was my Smoke,

Chapter two: prove, you deserve to start over.

Two:

I smiled as I saw Alec standing in his sexy glory by his car waiting for me. He had asked me to go with him to one of his friends' special parties and I was very excited to impress them.

Alec and I shared secrets that if were known, they might actually ruin us completely. My father is the headmaster at school while I was the honor student with the cheerleader title, no one can imagine the things I go through to survive the day.

As soon as his eyes fell on me running towards him in my cheerleader outfit, since I had no time to change, he smiled and threw the cigarette he held between his fingers on the ground. My eyes frowned and I fought the thumping in my heart and the words my mind whispered to force me to pick up that cigarette and take a whiff.

"Hey babe" he said happily and leant in to kiss me taking me away from that fight in my soul and I was grateful. When I tried to smoke weed, it felt magical, it was like I was flying and even though I always laughed at whoever said drugs make you fly, right now that I'm in that experience myself life proved that it was very hard to describe it as anything else. You feel light, feathery, and happy and can do anything.

I hid the fact that I was addicted from my parents, my friends and Alec himself even though I know he'd be there for me always. However, I was simply ashamed of finding pleasure in something as this.

I remember reading a book named,' A million little pieces' and it talked about a man who was found almost dead at a dark street and then was sent to his family whom will send him to rehab. It talks about how cynical he is and how pessimistic he is; it accurately described the pain of withdrawal and the mind's fights with him.

I pity myself for falling in that trap since I promised myself then that I will never lay a finger on this poison. But there I was, addicted but hiding it with my makeup, trying to keep up the A's and the fake smiles on my parents' faces.

I knew one day I'll crash, I didn't know when though. I feared that day.

On the ride to Alec's friend's place, my stomach had been churning in excitement. I was holding the dress I was planning to wear in between my sweaty palms and every now and then, I'd steal a look at my boyfriend sitting next to me. I felt something deep for him but I was scared to call it something it's not. I've never had a boyfriend before and I didn't want to mess this one out because of a talking mouth.

"I have something for you" he spoke while fiddling with his pockets with one hand, holding the steering wheel with the other. I eagerly awaited his present.

When he got out a small cigarette in his hand, I felt a mixed emotion of happiness and anger. Sometimes, I had this feeling that he was using drugs to tame me. I've always been the girl people didn't purposely hate or love. I was just liked all the time, especially with what had been said as a fiery heart and a wide contagious smile.

Alec always mentioned that I was a challenge to be controlled, but he loved the crazy me nonetheless. He always convinced me that drugs freed us, made us bypass all the limitations we put for ourselves and ignoring those limitations while being high was the best bliss. Shamefully, I couldn't deny any single word.

I silently took the smoke from his fingers and then stuck my hand into his pocket to get a lighter. A crooked smile was on his lips since he always talked about how it was such a turn on for him to find my hand stuck in his pocket.

The second I put the smoke in between my lips, I felt the poison spread through my blood system faster than oxygen and in a moment, my vision turned blurry. I knew on the spot that whatever I had just smoked was not regular weed, but I couldn't feel unhappy with what I just took.