Matty is absent
from school
again
the next day.
When I text her
to ask what's wrong,
she tells me that she
simply is feeling a bit
under the weather.
Remembering her expression
at the hospital yesterday,
I decide not to press her
any further,
and instead tell her
to feel better soon,
because my mother
would probably
freak out
if she didn't.
She seems very attached
to Matty already,
after all.
Matty doesn't reply
after that,
but I assume it's because
she's gone back
to sleep
or something,
as sick people tend to do.
With that in mind,
I leave the conversation
where it is
and put away my phone.
Due to standardized testing
in the lower grades,
our schedules have been
majorly rearranged today.
As a result, I have
eighth period
art class first -
and while I like the
class itself,
I can't stand
the people in it -
and especially not
this early
in the morning.
To make matters worse,
the teacher announces
that we will be
switching seats -
"for a fresh perspective
on this class,"
as she says.
I don't see how
sitting next to
someone
I already have seen
in a different part
of the room
will improve my
talent in art
or productivity,
but whatever.
The name she calls
directly following mine
as she proceeds with
the new seating arrangements
nearly makes me
groan aloud:
"Seth Hunter."
The most jerkish
kid in the class -
the one who leads
my personal entourage
of bullies
and instigated the use of
my horrible nickname of
'queer' -
falls into the seat
beside mine
with a loud sigh.
He then proceeds
to sneer
in my direction
with an almost
defensive cruelty.
"Great,"
he laughs,
"I get to sit
with
freak boy,
here.
Or is it
really
a boy?
I can't tell."
He doesn't even
make an attempt
to keep his voice down,
and his buddies
across the room
laugh at his derision
as a result.
The teacher,
oblivious as always,
doesn't hear him
and so
moves on with her
seat assignations
none the wiser.
Glowering down
at the
paint-splattered table
I'm now seated at,
I try my hardest to
ignore him,
knowing that my irritation
will only encourage him
all the more -
but ultimately,
that attempt fails.
It proves to be
even more impossible
when he leans in close
to my ear
and snarls,
"What?
Cat got your tongue,
huh?
Say hi to your new
seat partner,
fag."
There are days
when I can't deal with
humanity
as a whole
on account of its
instinctual patronization
and habitual
social cruelties -
but today definitely
takes the cake
on that front.
It's all I can do
not to
slap
that snide smirk
off of Seth's face,
even if it would bring
a single moment's
satisfaction.
But I don't -
because that's as long
as my victory
would ever last.
It almost kills me to
turn away
and pretend as though
I don't hear his jeering
and his friends' laughing
as the teacher
begins her lesson.
I can feel myself
sinking further
and further
away,
down into
the depths
of the loneliness
and despair
that are
all too familiar
from before.
Is there ever
going to be
an escape from all this
hatred
and intolerance?
On days like today,
I doubt it will
ever come.
×
I think I might have had a heart attack when I first logged on after work, because Misalignment has now reached #29!!! After the day I've had, I almost cried (happy tears, don't worry) when I saw that. It's seriously amazing how much attention Cam's little story has gotten in such a short time. I think tomorrow will be a month since I posted the first chapter, and considering it's already well on its way to 2K reads... I can't express my gratitude enough. I never can. I'm so glad that so many people are enjoying this story, and that my goal of spreading the word about agender (and other genderqueer) people is becoming realized as a result. I really love you guys, every last one of you. If any of you ever need anything, just hit me up, I'll always be here. It's the least I can do.
Okay, I'm done being sappy and whatever. Sorry about that. If you guys liked this chapter (even with stupid Seth being a bigot), I would love if you guys would vote and leave me some feedback below - or just like, cry with me over how stupid everyone is to Cam in this story (it's gonna get worse soon, let me tell you). It would all be much appreciated!! c:
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Misalignment | ✔
Teen Fiction"There are a million shades of grey between their black and their white - but no one ever cares to see them." In a world with a limited view of gender, Cam Shills struggles to come to terms with their identity as neither male nor female, a shade of...
