I decided to stay at Parker's for the night, since he kept insisting. It didn't feel right, but nothing has lately.
I flopped on the bed staring up at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. Parker's apartment was so beautiful, I felt so awkward feeling so shitty in this wonderful place. I unpacked my small bag of clothes and such and laid back down. Little bright flecks caught my eye from the window closest to my bed. We had a beautiful view of downtown L.A. All the lights twinkled under the shadowy darkness the sky offered. I slipped on my headphones, the feeling was so familiar, like a retired boxer slipping in the ring once last time. Old memories danced through my head with each new song.'Born for this,' reminded me of the nights I practically had to sit on my own hands. 'Edge of Glory,' when the stranger in the red jacket fought the crowd just to dance with me. After all I'm his monster sister<3 'Kissing in Cars' the first time anyone told me they loved me & meant it. Looking back on my life, I realize every time anyone told me no, I fought harder, I struggled to get where I am, but I did it myself. "Best friends" have left, "boyfriends" have fled, but in the end it was all me. I am hated for being myself, I am targeted for chasing my dreams thousands of miles away, but it was worth every tear. I wasn't born to be understood, I was born to inspire. Kellin was something else, but I need an equal, someone just as limitless as myself. The only real love for me, is the love that will set you free.
I called Kellin and told him all I knew how to say.
"Kay?" he answered obviously surprised by my call.
"Yeah. Listen, just let me finish. I love you. You're the best guy I've ever been with... and then some. But you need an equal. I need an equal. You have a lot figured out, I'm searching myself figuring it out. We are in completely different places in our lives. I won't ask you to change, and I don't want to change myself. This is for the best, I love you Kellin, forever.
"oh" he breathed hazily. The tears fogged my eyes once again.
"I understand, beautiful. I love you too."
Jittery from the shock of hearing his voice since the fight I hung up. It hurt a lot, but I knew we both would always care for each other no matter, and that is the most beautiful thing at all.
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Broke Summers (Kellin Quinn)
FanfictionKay's finally living her dream summer, complete with tan lines, freshly dyed hair, and matching vans. While on a class trip to California she get's lost in her own world, still struggling with re-occurring pain and depression, that is until she meet...
