Broke Summers (Kellin Quinn)

The hardest part is letting go

I woke up with a throbbing headache, and a hand resting on my arm. I tilted my head up, it was Kellin. He gazed at me.

"She's up!" Kellin cheered.

"Yay!" smiled Ari. Surrounding her was Max, Parker, Josh,  and Skylar.

"Kell, you convinced nurse Renee to bring me back?"

"Who's nurse Renee"

"Um the one in the mental hospital...Remember?" I asked

He shook his head and everyone watching crinkled their eyebrows in confusion. He silently rested his head on my shoulder and continued to tell me how happy he was I made it.

"Why did you send my away!" I cried.

"You were in a coma babe, you weren't in reality. The nurses said you appeared to be having vivid dreams."

I nodded. I breathed more fluidly down knowing I didn't stab Jed, and Kellin never left my side, and I wasn't in the mental hospital.

"You wanna talk about it? You look pretty worked up?"

I shook my head and kissed him. Wow, how I had missed that.

"I want to show you something," Kellin pulled out his iphone and clicked on his instagram page. In the bio, in big flashy letters it read forever my heart lies with Kay. Still very weary, I smiled weakly and grasped his hand. The fact I was safe now was a good feeling, but sitting here with Kellin, our breathing slow and relax, made me realize how he had saved me. He pulled out two earphones and gently gave me one. He put on Stomach Tied In Knots. I cant live without you now, I can't even live with myself. There we laid, his worn jeans brushed up against the yoga shorts I was allowed to wear during recovery, and I honestly had never felt so close to anyone, even the way his cool breath ticked my ear as he talked me through that painful night reminded me I was not alone, and with Kellin I never would be.

That night I woke up my mouth sticky and the air around me seemed thick. Kellin still rested in the same spot cuddled up to me, his arms wrapped protectively around my waist as if to say, touch her and you'll die. I laughed. His eyes flicked open and he pulled me closer and whispered "You alright?" I shook my head. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I had a bad dream..." my shoulders trembled.

"What happed Kay?"

I remain silent as the weight of the world crushed down on me from the concern upon Kellin's angelic face.

" Tell me, it's okay."

I slumped down and buried my face in Kellin's chest. He smiled. " C'mon please?" He begged. I apologized again.

"I know you find comfort in my shirt... but I need you to look at me," he joked. I took a deep breath ready to spilled my guts to him, but before I could he took off his shirt in an attempt for me to take my head out of his shoulder. That only helped. I giggled. I sat up this time as Kellin patted himself on the back for his clever thinking.

"In my dream I couldn't eat again. I was back home and I fell into old patterns, you know?" Kellin grabbed my wrist and tenderly kissed the traces of my scars. I wiped tears. "I went back out with my ex only to get cheated. Everything went back to the way it used to be, like with the bullying..." I stopped myself realizing I had confessed all my struggles in less than two minutes.

"Oh Kay, it's going to be ok. If anyone makes you feel anything but important I'll be there, trust me."

He rubbed the small of my back and let the hot rush of the dream evaporate between us. He grasped my waist with one hand, and my cheek with the other. There we sat under the flickering hospital lights, the smell of a doctors office was somewhere mixed in between the familiar scent of Kellin. He kissed me slowly and gradually grew more intense pressing himself more hungrily against my small figure. He grazed my jaw line with his lingering kiss. A moan or two escaped, breaking the silence we held. My eyes were no longer longing for someone, my eyes were no longer swollen from tears I never should have cried, my eyes no longer saw dark skies, they saw a beautiful grey canvas eating up the sky. Kellin didn't know how much he had changed me for the better, I could live in peace for once in my life. Now comes the hard part...going home.