Battle of Hearts: Two

Chapter 47

Chapter 47

"Not really sure how to feel about it. Something in the way you move, makes me feel like I can't live without you. It takes me all the way. And I want you to stay." ('Stay'- Rihanna)

He could've pushed me away or I could've pushed him away. But we didn't and slowly our kiss turned from being soft and careful to being rough and reckless. I wasn't thinking much when my hands were over his neck and his hands were draped around my waist as he pulled me closer and I did the same. I had forgotten that his lips always made my knees weak. My heart was pounding at how good it felt like to kiss him. Like he belonged to me. He still had that enchanting effect of a first kiss. And we kissed like there was no tomorrow.

Until we realised there was indeed a tomorrow. We both pulled apart struggling to breathe from our intense kisses as well as the harsh reality. His intense breath washed over my face. "Sorry..." I said, unable to face him.

"I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have done that," He frantically started roaming his eyes around till he found his car. "I should probably leave," He told me, before jogging to his car and speeding away.

"How could you be so stupid," I said loudly to myself, kicking a nearby rock. I scolded myself all the way to the front door thinking that I ruined a perfectly decent friendship with him.

Setting my bags down, I rung the doorbell. My brother opened the door and grinned at me. "Who did you come with?" Alex asked.

"My ex boyfriend." I rolled my eyes.

"That's good to hear, ex boyfriend." He said, before letting me inside. I sighed instantly, as the familiar smell of my home greeted me. It had never smelled better. No matter how much I loved LA and its busy lifestyle, my home always reminded me of the good moments in my life.

Everyone at home including my mother, was nice and welcoming now that I wasn't with the love of my life. Alex never failed to show his relief about my break up. He said he never liked Cameron. He was a protective brother he didn't like any guy who was within two yards from me. After dinner with my family, I went upstairs to my old room. The place where I had spent countless nights texting Cameron.

I decided to unpack my luggage tomorrow because I was exhausted from being in a car all day. I laid in my bed with the thoughts that inevitably would come to mind. I had no idea what that kiss meant to us. It could be a goodbye kiss or a sign that he still had some feelings for him. The latter cheered me as I realised his love for me wasn't totally dead. But, would these feelings lead to a relationship?

I still loved him immensely, but I didn't want to get hurt again by being in a relationship with him. The damages from before weren't still fully healed. I could never forget the pain I had been in when he left me, breaking all his promises. All those were meaningless words that I had believed in so easily. I couldn't get myself to believe him again, even if he was hard to resist.

I weighed my choices. If we go back to being just friends, it would be hard to deny the force of attraction between us. But, if we get back together I would eventually be exhausted of working so hard to make it work with him. It was either losing him forever or losing myself forever. In both choices I have to endure through pain, so I decide to choose the one which promised lesser pain.

*

The loud vibration under my pillow threw me out of my sleep. I reached for it and squinted at the screen. My old friend Becky's name flashed and I was instantly alarmed. I checked the time, it was 11:30 in the morning, and bright sunshine was peeping through  the curtains.