18: big happy family

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B i g
happy family
~+~+~+~

"AILIE."

My eyes fluttered opened as I blinked, trying to see in the darkening room as I pulled my glasses on. Memories of my day rolled through my mind as I stretched awake. Ashton had decided to come up to say his goodbyes to my sister, but Aurora quickly guilted him into watching a movie with her and I.

My eyes widened as I finally took in the two wide green eyes watching me. I fell asleep during the movie.

"You need to get him out, Ailie." Aurora whispered frantically as we both heard the crashing around downstairs.

Dad was home.

Ashton was lying on the other side of Aurora, his arm over his eyes and messing up his hair as he peacefully let out soft snores that -had I been in any other situation- would have made me laugh. I crawled over my sister and placed my hands on his broad shoulder. However, before I could shake him, he shot up and pinned me down onto the mattress by my wrists, his thighs hugging my hips as he hovered over me. His dark eyes were cold and deadly as his breath fell raggedly into my face -only inches away from my own.

"Ashton, it's just me," I squeaked out in shock. He looked like he was keeping someone from hurting him. It... Broke my heart. He was so ferocious. No one should have to be that on-edge while asleep. "Ashton, it's okay. It's okay. Just wake up." I whispered softly to the dazed boy.

His eyes finally unglazed from sleep -widening slightly as he noticed our position. His body turned stiff as he tried to wrap his head around what just happened. "What-"

"We have to be quiet." I pulled my hand out from his loosened grip and covered his mouth before he could say another word. "Just get off of me and follow me, okay?" I chewed my bottom lip, my stomach quickly filling with acid as my ears strained for my dads movements.

He did as told, his eyes never leaving me as I squeezed my sisters hand while she watched with sadness in her eye. "Lee, don't." She whimpered out.

I smiled gently, "Don't you worry about me. I can handle this." Turning back to Ashton's questioning gaze, I sighed. "Can you take my sister with you until Carrie comes to pick her up?"

He nodded slowly, still unsure about what was going on.

I smiled gratefully and quickly pulled Rora into a hug, "I'll see you Friday. We have plans with Aunt Mel, remember?" I mumbled into her messy hair before letting her go and standing up from the bed. "Um, Ashton..." My voice was small as I looked down at my curled up socked toes. I could feel his gaze on me so I continued, "Try to not listen when you're down there, okay?"

I didn't let him answer as I left the room. As soon as I was down the stairs, I tried to prepare mentally for the next part. Aurora peeked at me from the top of the stairs as I walked into the living room where my father was sitting watching tv.

"Get out, girl." He started lowly with a growl, already somehow knowing I was standing behind the couch.

I clenched my jaw and walked in front of him as I faced the dark haired man, "I-I was just wondering-"

"I don't give a shît about what you were wondering!" His enraged green eyes washed over my face, taking in my mothers blonde hair and grey-green eyes. "I can't stand to look at you! You're a disgrace! You have no right to look like her!" He screamed, towering over me as he stood up from the couch. "She was everything you aren't. You're nothing but a waste of space in her house. A space that she should be filling. Not you." He spat, shoving me out of his way and into the coffee table as he stormed off to the kitchen --unable to even be in the same room as his worthless daughter.

Without looking up I gestured for Aurora and Ashton to start making their escape. With a frown I made my way for a second round.

"Dad-"

"Do you not understand I don't want to see you?" He growled as I stood blocking his way out of the kitchen -keeping him from seeing Ashton and Aurora. "Do you know that when I saw her blonde hair on the fûcking table, my first thought was that I wished that the hair belonged to you. Not her." He muttered making me hold back a sob that shook my body from the inside. "I hate you." He confessed coldly not for the first time. "I hate that she was killed. I hate that you were the one that lived." He glared at me finally, "Is that what you wanted me to say? Is that what you were wondering?" His eyes speared through me as I tried to swallow through the thickness in my throat. "Did you want me to admit that I wished to God for my own fûcking daughter to be dead?"

The endless tears finally fell down my cheeks as I stood my ground, "I-"

"I hate you. I hate you for making me wish my own flesh and blood dead. I hate you for merely breathing." He took steps towards me as his eyes burned with that hate, "I hate you, Ailie." His breath hit my face as he stopped right in front of me while I trembled in fear and pain. "The only thing keeping me from finishing the job myself, is that face you stole. That beautiful fûcking face that makes me hate you even more."

With that he shoved me into the side of the door frame and walked away. Sobs rocked through my body as I finally fell down to the ground, hearing his words play over and over again like a broken record. Each time more cruel and laced in a poison so painful that the only thing I could do was collapse into the ground and pray that this was all just a horrible nightmare.

That I would wake up tomorrow and find mom cooking breakfast and dad would glance up with a loving smile on his happy face and say, "good morning, sweet pea. I hope you had a good sleep."

That he would love me again. That my mother wasn't dead. And that we were that big happy family again.

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