Never be the same (Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier)

Chapter 22

"It's amazing, watching skin heal and realizing you haven't."

"The weather forecast shows that we are going to have a storm coming our way tonight." I heard the man on the radio speaking as we were being driven back to the base.

I looked at Soldier and I could see confusion and distress on his face and I wasn't sure what had caused it. Maybe it was the fact that we weren't just ghost stories anymore, I know that this made me more than anxious. The helicopters that I had been shooting were apparently filming and podcasting everything all over the world which meant that neither Soldier or I were the assets in the shadows anymore. Our identities weren't Hydra's well-kept secret anymore.

Hydra was disappointed in both of us. It was the first time that we had ever failed our mission. I knew that we were gonna get punished for it, there was no escape from that.

* * *

"You could have done better!" One of the men shouted at me as he punched me in the stomach once again.

I screamed out in pain. Trashing around, trying to break free from the chains that were binding me to the wall. Punch after punch, scream after scream, insult after insult.

By the time they finished with me I was so angry that I wanted to tear both of their heads off, but of course I couldn't do that. They took the chains off and started taking me back to my room. I heard shattering coming from the end of the hall and saw Pierce rushing past me with Rumlow hot on his tail.

"Soldier?" I managed to choke out which seemed to catch Rumlow's attention.

"I'll take her." he said to the two men and grabbed me by the arm to drag me along with him.

"Sir, he's unstable. Erratic." a man told Pierce as we stepped into the room.

Soldier was sitting on a chair in the middle of the room, looking into the void. His shirt was off and I could see the part where the metal met with his flesh, I could see a few scars scattered across his chest and stomach. "You're not the only one that's got scars." his words rang in my head.

Rumlow took a hold of both of my arms to keep me in place which made me gasp out in pain a little. He had grabbed me way too roughly. Soldier's face changed lightly as he saw what they had done to me, a look of concern took over his features. I know that I don't remember pretty much anything that has happened to me, but seeing emotion on his face was so unfamiliar and new to me, that I didn't know what to do other than stare right back at him.

"Mission report!" Pierce spoke, making us break our eye contact and making Soldier's face turn back to void, "Mission report now!"

Soldier kept staring in front of him, not speaking a word. I jumped as Pierce smacked Soldier across the face. I could feel Rumlow behind me trying to hide his amusement. I didn't know what to do. I mean, it wasn't like I could do anything really but it was so strange seeing Soldier act this way. Then I remembered his face in the car, he had the same look there. I thought it would go away, but apparently I was mistaken.

After the smack Soldier's face looked more confused than ever as he finally spoke, "The man on the bridge. Who was he?" Was he talking about Rogers?

"You met him earlier this week on another assignment." Then it hit me, he was the man on the roof. How did I not put it together before?

"I knew him." Soldier sounded so broken, so defeated as he spoke the words. I was now more than certain that I had never seen him like this before.

Pierce took a seat on a chair in front of him before speaking again, "Your work has been a gift to mankind." I had heard those words before, "You shaped the century, and I need you to do it one more time." Pierce paused for a moment before continuing and I could easily see the pain on Soldier's face.

"Society's at a tipping point between order and chaos and tomorrow morning we're gonna give it a push. But, if you don't do your part, I can't do mine and Hydra can't give the world the freedom it deserves." Pierce finished his little speech looking between both Soldier and I.

Soldier looked down for a moment and then looked back up and I could see his eyes becoming watery, "But I knew him." he said quietly.

My mouth fell open as he said it, not only because of what he said but also because of the amount of hurt behind his voice. My breathing became heavier as I noticed the look on Pierce's face as he stood up. He talked with one other man in the room for a moment but I wasn't paying attention. The only thing my eyes could focus on was the look on his face as he just sat there.

All of a sudden Soldier was being pushed against the back of the chair and given a mouthguard. Then the chair switched on and a couple of restraints closed around his arms and legs. Soldier's breathing changed drastically and his right hand started shaking, while at the same time my breath hitched in my throat as a metal helmet closed around his head.

Then started the electrocution, and even though it wasn't me in the chair I couldn't help but whimper and turn my head to the side so I wouldn't have to see him like this.

"You wanted to see, so look!" Rumlow hissed in my ear as he held me in place with his left hand and turned my head to look at him with his right. I had no way out, I had to watch him scream out in agony.

"See, that's what happens if you don't behave like you are supposed to! You don't have any right to fight or talk back, you are nothing more than a weapon and that's who you'll always be!" Pierce talked to me like I was an animal that needed to be restraint, I think he actually believed that. Was I?

"If you tell him about anything that he said here, I promise you, I'll order him to kill you himself!" That was the moment that I understood how controlled I actually was, I could not escape.

I stared at Soldier and thought about what Pierce had just told me. The machine was wiping his memories and that's when I realized why I never really remembered anything. I was not free, I never was. There was no storm outside tonight. Instead of rain, blood fell that night.