chapter 12

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Anaïs was still wide awake when Ryder slipped under the covers. She felt the bed shift and her whole body went on the alert. There was only about a foot of space between them; she regretted not going for the queen sized bed. A full had seemed large enough but now… she hadn’t anticipated having a man spend the night with her.

“You awake?” he whispered and Anaïs felt him turn on his side. 

She turned on her side as well and noticed that the light from the moon was coming in through a tiny opening in the curtain; it illuminated the space between them which Anaïs found pretty darn ironic. 

“Yeah, I am,” she answered as she studied his face. 

She had the advantage because she could see him clear as day while she seemed nothing but a silhouette to him.

“I just wanted to say, in case you misunderstood, that I wasn’t only asking for sex. I’m 

sorry if you thought I only wanted that from you.”

“You’re a good man Ryder,” Anaïs murmured after a pause. 

“No I’m not, not really, I just can’t help it when I’m around you.”

“You’re nothing like I expected to be honest.”

“In what way?”

“I thought you’d be a bit like Nikolas; you know, the typical playboy. Unless you’re an amazing liar and an even better actor, I don’t think that’s the case.”

Ryder rolled onto his back once again and stared blindly up at the ceiling. Anaïs thought for a moment that she had angered him but she saw him smile and it took her breath away. 

“Well I won’t go as far as calling myself a playboy. I don’t have nearly as many conquests as Nikolas and I don’t plan to but I enjoy women. No better way to study a woman’s form than through sex,” he whispered, eyes twinkling in the dark. 

Anaïs remembered Jacque saying the same exact thing about sex once upon a time but it didn’t affect her; in her mind and even in her heart he was nothing like Ryder. Ryder was a man where Jacque had been nothing but a boy; a boy she had loved dearly but hadn’t ever truly been in love with. She was seeing that now; the different forms of love. If anything good came of this situation, it was the realization that she had spent her life mourning for a love that had never been as true as she had thought. It made it so much easier to move on. 

“How many women have you slept with?”

It was a nosy question but Anaïs was curious. Ryder was human she knew the average male slept with-

“Around 35 give or take. I don’t remember how many exactly. I went through a crazy sex phase during college. I think I did nearly every freshman my senior year.”

“Good god! You were quite the slut.”

“I prefer the term ‘experienced’.”

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