Winter's Fire → Game of Thrones

v. Feasts

a/n: Just a head's up, but there's one part with quite a bit of swearing but it's only a few lines.

I was sitting on a bench in the gardens with my eyes closed, listening to the breeze and birds chirping. Not seeing was strengthening my ability to smell and hear, and most likely touch and taste too. Being blind forever would keep all of those senses strong, but it is not worth it to me. If I could not see, I would not be able to see the beauty in things. Perhaps I would not miss it, but I would be curious.

People will be arriving soon, and Illyrio would most likely be furious if he found out that I was not ready, so I decided to head back to my chambers. We are feasting the magisters on the council of Pentos, as well as the Prince of Pentos. Alios would have held the feast in the palace, if it were not for the fact that the last Prince of Pentos banned Illyrio from ever stepping inside.

My dress was a red with purple in it, much like wine, and had armour embroidered into the front. Illyrio's excuse is that it will keep me safe tonight, but I can keep myself safe. If I need to then I will fight to survive. It certainly would not be the first time within this month.

Daenerys and I had spoken earlier, and she expressed how nervous she was. I would be too if I were the one being feasted, but thankfully no one really cares about the exiled daughter of a Westerosi lord. I doubt any of them actually know who my father is, other than a friend of the Usurper. That is if they even know that much.

She was wearing a dress from Pentos, not a Westerosi styled one like mine. I would give anything to not have to wear this, but unfortunately I am expected to look and act a certain way. Wearing this god-awful dress is just one of those many ways that I am expected to look tonight. It is a beautiful dress for sure, but it is hot and uncomfortable.

As for Viserys, well, who knows how he feels? We have only spoken in passing since I cried on his shoulder eight days ago. He has been quiet, uncharacteristically so as Daenerys tells me. She could not even come up with a theory as to why he was so quiet, and neither could I. I do suspect he will be talkative tonight at least.

Once my dress and shoes were on, I brushed my hair and braided two rather thin strands at the top before tying them together. Being Westerosi makes me nervous because I look so different, but at least I am not a Targaryen. Most men would not be used to seeing people with fair skin, silver hair, and purple eyes. It even surprised me a bit.

From what I have been told, Alios will be on his very best behaviour tonight. Well, by very best the magisters expect him to flirt with any beautiful woman within eye-shot and feast like a king. They are apparently suspicious of the fact that Alios rarely drinks alcohol, and about the fact that he does not over-indulge himself. He went silent when I asked him about fucking women, but that was a telling answer in itself.

Yesterday I did not send my family a letter, even though I send one every week. What is the point if they may never respond to me? I have, of course, thought about the fact that they might never get them or that they read the letters and cannot respond, but I do not believe that. I know they could respond if they wanted, and I doubt they even bother reading what I send.

I could hear the guests arriving from my chambers, but I did not yet feel ready to go out there. When I am surrounded by a large number of people that I do not know, I feel so uncomfortable and out of place. It all gets too much after a while, but it was fine in Winterfell because I had my family and friends there with me. No one can see how I feel, but that does not change the fact that I feel that way.

These people judge me as soon as they hear about me, and I cannot blame them. When they see me, their stares are often focused on me, and it scares me. I do not know these people, or what they are capable of, or even what they want from me. I just have to pretend to trust them and to get along with them to stay alive.