pathetic |/ ON HOLD

t e n

tyler |/ pov

the bus was quiet once i got back from the bowling. my mind was reeling from thinking about moon and hoping she was okay. i don't like her or anything, but i know that josh truly does. i can still care for her though.

for some reason i see myself in her. her thoughts are like mine. the way she acts is kind of how i act sometimes. we're quiet similar.

i wish jenna was here, not only because i miss her a lot, but because i feel as though moon could really benefit with having a female friend. her and jenna would get on so well, they could go shopping and talk, and do whatever else girls do. 

as i walked into the back lounge, through the bunks, i put on my music, letting the sound wash over me and clean me. the back lounge was were we practised and mad new music whilst on the road, and what better time to write when i'm completely alone. i picked up my ukulele by the next, swinging it round so it could rest on my lap. my fingers held the all too familiar chords as i strummed trying to come up with a new tune. every now and again i would write a couple of chord progressions down, making sure i wouldn't forget them and have to start over.

whenever i would create or practise music, my mind seemed to enter a sort of time warp, losing all sense of time. it was quite relaxing, but quite scary at the same time. i forget about all my needs, like food and drink.

my 'warp' was broken when i heard the sound of the bus door opening. it must be the crew or someone, coming back from wherever they went. i stood up, walking back through the bunks towards the front of the bus. i saw the all too familiar coloured hair, getting excited as my best fren had come back. i thought he would've spent the night at moon's house though.

"yo jishwa, what's up?" i called as he walked through the front lounge to where i stood. 

he looked up at me with a tear stained face, and slightly pouty lips. i felt my heart shatter as i saw my brother (an: i know that they aren't real brothers, but that's how they see themselves towards each other okok). he looked so ruined. like one of the buildings that you would find in pompeii, all wrecked from the volcano erupting. 

"i ruin-ed it, tyler. i messed up so bad" was all that josh said before he completely broke down in tears, sobs shaking his body. 

 i knew that there wasn't any point in trying to get him to talk, so instead i just wrapped my arms around him, pulling him down to the couch with me. i hugged him as i would hug zack or jay, my arm rubbing up and down his back in a circle, trying to stop him hiccuping and crying.

something must have happened at moon place, i can't think for the life of my what it could have been though. 

we must have sat there for about 20 minutes. just me hugging my friend, and josh gripping me back tightly his head leaning against my shoulder. i knew that josh would do the same thing for me, that's just how it worked.

"ok, i-i think i'm ready t-to talk now" josh leant back, hiccuping his way through his sentence.

"are you sure?" i pulled away too so that i could look at him in the eye.

josh just nodded in return pulling his sleeves down to his fingertips, grasping them to make sweater paws. "well, we went back to her flat, and i asked her why she suddenly got upset during the day. she told me what she thought, i'm sure you already know, how she doesn't think that she's worth the time. but she really is, honestly." he started, still sniffing occasionally.

i nodded for him to continue.

"she then started talking about what she went through. a-and, she self harms, tyler," tears started to run from his eyes again, "so then i asked her to show me, and it's just one line, but it's one line too many. we then got really close, and she, like, brushed her thumb along the bottom of my lip. and then we kissed. tyler, oh my god, i really like her and i know that we haven't even known each other for that long, but that kiss confirmed that i really do like her, honestly, from the bottom of my being, i know that i do"

i nodded, smiling slightly for my best friend. he really did like her, i could tell. "what's the problem then? did she not kiss you back?" i asked, my eyebrows furrowing.

"no, no she did kiss back, but.. oh my god tyler, you're gonna hate me" josh started crying again. 

"josh, know that i could never truly hate you, okay. i trust you, and i hope that you trust me okay?" i reassured him, getting quite nervous as to what he was going to tell me.

"do you remember debby? that girl we met at one of our concerts?" i nodded in response to his question. "well, we got together before we left for this tour. i cheated on debby with moon, and i really hurt moon in the process" josh cried out, letting his head hang, his shoulders slumping.

i was quite taken back by what i just heard. i know that josh would never intentionally hurt someone, not if he could help it. he must really like moon.

"josh, look at me," i told him, waiting for him to lift his head, "i don't agree with what you have done, and honestly it kinda disgusts me. but, you're my bestest friend, so, i'm going to help you, okay?" my mind was going into overdrive thinking about all of this. it makes me wonder what josh is thinking.

"i don't want to lose moon, but i don't want to hurt debby either" josh told me.

"you need to decide which girl you like more, debby and moon" i was trying to be rational and give the best advice i could, because lets face it, it isn't everyday that you have to solve a mess like this.

"moon, she's the one that i like more" he stated, not even thinking about it.

"okay, so what you need to do is call debby, and tell her what happened, and that you can't see her anymore. just try and stay calm, it might get pretty heated" he nodded, showing that he understood.

"and for moon, you're going to have to wait before you talk to her, let her cool down or whatever. if she really likes you then she'll come around" i told him.

"i think i'm going to go and take a nap, i'm really tired" josh yawned, rubbing his eyes.

"ok buddy, i'll wake you up in a bit" i called after him, as he walked towards the bunks.

this is what friends are for, and i'm going to try my best to be here for josh.

_________

AN

so there we go

i put spaces between all of the paragraphs and i like it better, what do u think?

so i'm sorry this is quite a filler-y chapter

but it is like 1197 words or smthn

thanks

stay street