Imagine time with EXO - the series

68. Imagine Luhan

Sometimes because of love you become so selfish, that you forget you have no right on someone else’s life.. But how can you control yourself, when you know that this might be your only chance to have him close to you?

However, you feel this is not about what might happen tomorrow.. is about living these moments and even if  the magic won’t last forever, will always be inside your heart for you to cherish it whenever loneliness will rot away your soul..

I don’t know why I did this… I just needed him.. I was wrong.. I might now lose my last hope.. but.. I’ll just keep things like that until a new dawn will ruin everything.. I’m praying every minute so that the day I fear the most will never come..

I kept telling my friend my stupid reasons, thinking that this way I’ll get rid of the pain that my conscience constantly gives to my heart… She tried everything to convince me, yet I couldn’t accept reality.. I had to get on with my fake world..

Friend: “Even if you know this is not right, you’re still doing it.. I don’t want you to be hurt..”

Me: “I will not.. I’ll be fine.. ”

Friend: “Well.. where is he? I didn’t see him around.. ”

Me: “He went for a walk by the lake..”

Friend: “Hm.. you should go to him.. He’s still recovering..”

She smiled and stood up, grabbing her bag and then she told me to take care and think again about all this.. I saw her out the house, then went back to my room to change my clothes.. She was right.. I had to check if he was ok.. Too much time has passed since he left..

I took the keys and got outside, closing the front door.. I decided to take my bike, to get there faster.. The weather was mild, even if it was rumoured a storm will come soon.. Nothing out of normal in this part of the country.. Still… for me that had another meaning.. a storm could easily wash out my hopes, my happiness… my life…

The wind gently blew through my hair, making it difficult for me to see things in front.. I had to put it behind my ear every few seconds, while holding the handle bar with one hand.. There weren’t many people around, since it was almost sunset time..

After 15 minutes I got there.. I kept looking for his bike, while walking beside mine, turning my head from left to right, getting quite worried.. I then saw something laying on the ground near the lake.. I narrowed my eyes, trying to figure it out what was there…

I felt as if my heart was ripped by an invisible knife when I recognised the person.. I threw the bike and ran towards him, forgetting about everything else, even breathing.. I saw him down on the grass, with his eyes closed and with his hands wide opened, holding in one a bouquet of white and blue flowers..

I kneeled down and shook him, feeling like crying.. He opened his eyes slowly, looking at me all confused and scared.. got up, running his hand through his golden like wheat hair, pouting..

“You scared me!”

Me: “I scared you? I thought I’ll die when I saw you like this.. What were you doing?”

“I just layed here to rest a bit.. guess I fell asleep..”

Me: “Sleeping at this hour? ”

“You know I am a morning deer.. I need my afternoon nap.. he he..”

Me: “God.. never scare me like that again, Luhan!”

He smiled and pinched my cheek, then he raised his hand slowly, making big eyes when seeing the wilting flowers.. I chuckled, telling him it didn’t matter.. still beautiful enough to melt my heart..