Yami Yugi: Yu-Gi-Oh!, the Abridged Series! According to Wikipedia, we don't exist!
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Setting: An alley in Domino City, mostly empty except two boys.
Stranger: Hey, punk! This card isn't Graceful Charity, it's Graceful Dice!
Guy: Really? I guess I got them confused. But you can't really blame me, they're very similar.
Stranger: Like heck they are! Graceful Dice has a dice on it, where as Graceful Charity does not have a dice! You sir, are a fool!
Mokuba: *blows a whistle*
Stop fighting!Stranger: Who the heck are you?!
Mokuba: I'm the commissioner for the Battle City Tournament. What I say goes, and I say you have to buy me a pet rabbit, because my big brother won't let me have one.
Stranger: Nuts to your rabbit!
Seto: Oh Mokuba, are you abusing your position of power again?
Mokuba: Seto!
Stranger: Kaiba!
Seto: Sorry if my brother is bothering you. He does that. A lot. To show my sympathy, I'd like to offer you all the trading cards you'll ever need, but only if you duel me in return.
Stranger: This couldn't possibly be some form of a trap. I accept!
Seto: *smiling* Heh.
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Seto: Now you get to enjoy years of painful and upsetting therapy. Come on Mokuba, let's go get you that pet tarantula.
Mokuba: You mean "rabbit", right, Seto?
Seto: You are getting a tarantula and you will like it.
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Setting: On a stage inside a building.
Yami Yugi: Hey, a magic show! This looks slightly less depressing than watching Joey duel!
Clown: Neheheheheheh! Hello, Yugi! We've been expecting you! Come this way, my master is waiting!
Yami: *Thinking*
I spy with my little eye, something beginning with "gay clown". I have a bad feeling about this._____________________________
Setting: Back on the streets.
Mokuba: Seto!
Seto: What?
Mokuba: Yugi just dropped off our sensors, we can't locate him! He's disappeared!
Seto: Somehow, this is your fault! If I wasn't so busy buying you a scorpion, this never would have happened!
Mokuba: But I thought we were getting a tarantula.
Seto: It's always about what you want, isn't it Mokuba?
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Setting: Underneath the stage.
"Steve" Arkana: You know, there is an old saying amongst high rollers and card sharks: "Always trust your opponents, but only after you cut their deck."
Yami: Yeah? Well here's another saying: "Go *BEEP* yourself, Arkana."
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Setting: Underneath the stage.
"Steve" Arkana: Your plot twists pale in comparison to mine! How could you possibly hope to beat a movie franchise that earns over $100 million every year!
Yami: I see. Then the only way to defeat you is to spoil every plot twist in existence. Thereby ridding the general public of any desire to see your convoluted mess of a movie series!
"Steve" Arkana: You wouldn't dare!
Yami: Wanna bet?
*inhales*
SNAPE KILLS DU-_____________________________
Setting: The city streets.
Grandpa: Hello small child, I don't suppose you've seen the plot anywhere, have you? Téa and I have been looking everywhere for it.
Téa: We're such invaluable characters, the plot can't possibly move forward without us!
Mokuba: Don't worry, my big brother knows exactly wh-
Grandpa: Shut up, Mokuba!
Mokuba: No, you shut up!
There is a stunned silence.
Mokuba: Oh god, I am so sorry.
Téa: Did you just tell an old man to shut up?
Grandpa: Where the heck are your manners?!
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(Guess who's back?! It's finally summer!!! I can update more often! Yayyyyy! Thanks for hanging in everyone! As some of you have noticed, I have also made Thiefshipping - The Musical, so please go check it out! I would like to update that at least 4 times a week.
Thanks for reading! And for reading this (if you did), I leave you with a song parody.
Until next time~!)
The Phresh Pharaoh of Bel-Air:
Pharaoh Atem: *rapping to the beat of the theme song of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air*
Now this is a story all about how
My life got flipped,
Turned upside-down.
And I'd like to take a minute,
Just sit down James,
I'll tell you how I became the undisputed King of Card Games.In Northeastern Africa,
Born and raised.
In the palace, was where I spent most of my days.
Chillin' out max,
And relaxin' all the while,
Playin' some card games,
Right beside the Nile.
When a couple of guys,
Who were up to no good.
Started making trouble in my neighborhood.
I got in one little fight,
And the Gods got scared.
They said you're moving in with Yugi and his Grandpa downstairs.I wound up in Japan and things were less clear like,
I couldn't kill folks for losing card games here!
If anything I could say that this place was lame but I thought:
Nah, forget it. I'll play some card games.I.
Bought.
Card game booster packs,
Seven or eight.
And I yelled at the old man,
"Yoo-hoo, smell ya later!"
Looked at my kingdom,
I was finally there!
To sit on my throne with my ridiculous hair.
YOU ARE READING
Yu-Gi-Oh The Abridged Series!
HumorFunny jokes from each episode of YGOTAS! I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! Or YGOTAS, they both belong to their rightful owners. Thank you to @heartofthecards for the cover!