Stay. (A Niall Horan FanFiction)

Chapter 48

Sarah's POV

We watched Dear John and I ate my Mr. Noodles. This was the first time I didn't cry watching it. Avery did though. She didn't ask me why I wasn't crying, to be honest, I'm glad she didn't. I'm appreciating the times I'm not crying. Considering it was just yesterday, I'm kind of proud of myself.

Avery told me countless times, "it's ok not to be ok." But how long are you going to be a wreck before you realize life goes on, pain eventually does go away, and you'll have to be ok? That's my problem with that saying. As comforting as it is, I don't want to take refuge in it. They're just words. They don't feel pain or go through heart break. And besides some things are easier said than done.

What I really want, more than anything right now, is a do over. No, actually what I want is Niall. Not in the kind of way where we kiss and make up, I want to talk to him. More like yell at him because that's what I would end up doing anyway.

I couldn't even focus on the movie because I was thinking of things I want to say to Niall. But I know as soon as I get the chance and I look into those big bright baby blue eyes and not say a thing.

I've always loved that he had this effect on me, now I just hate it. I hate it because if I look at him I'll forgive too easily and forget all that happened.

I have to call Mikayla and ask if I can't take the days I'm working this week off. Once I explain why, I'm sure she'll understand.

As night time rolls around i'm desperate. I miss him. I miss him like fucking crazy. I know I really shouldn't, but I do. He was a big part of my everyday life, and now he's not. Avery left because she had work and she couldn't ditch her shift. So here I am, alone, again.

If I don't think of something to do my thoughts are going to drive me insane. I should call my mom, maybe she'll help.

Voicemail. Perfect.

I boiled the water in the kettle again to make another Mr. Noodles. I also put Dear John back on. If someone asked me why, I wouldn't be able to give them an answer. This is just the only thing I find even remotely distracting from my situation.

Niall's POV

An hour after smashing my phone, there was a knock at the door. I'm not in the fucking mood to see anyone.

When I opened the door, Liam, Louis, Zayn, and Harry, were all standing there hands in the pockets and worries expressions on their faces. So I gestured for them to come in.

Everyone took a seat on the couch. I don't know what to expect of this situation.

"Where'd you run off to last night?" Harry breaks the silence to ask first.

"I went to find Sarah." No use in lying. I wouldn't be able to come up with a good one even if I had time to plan ahead.

"So you're ok?" Louis asked.

"Not in the slightest." I've never felt like this before. I feel everything but ok. I feel anger, regret, frustration, disappointment, all those terrible things all rolled up into one.

"What happened?" Zayn looked a bit nervous to ask that. I don't blame him. I know my facial expression must look like I'm going to snap any second.

"Is everything alright, you look like a mess." Liam blurted before I could open my mouth. I know I look like a mess smart ass. Sometimes Liam can be really understanding, and other times he words just come out like verbal vomit. He can't control them.

"Liam." Louis scolded. He probably didn't want to provoke me, good for him for thinking that because he's right.

"Sarah and I broke up; I left." That's all I could say on the matter. I hope to god none of them ask why or how because I don't think I would be able to tell them without wanting to scream or throw something.